For this Thursday’s talky blog, Haley Star gives me a fantastic drag makeover complete with makeup, wigs and fake eyelashes. It was quite the transformation – and, when all was said and done, I had two takeaways from the ordeal: My pecs make great boobs (I was at least a D cup), and drag queens deserve a lot of respect.
As someone with an abnormally high voice and a tendency to talk with my hands, I’m often ridiculed for being too flamboyant. I like to think that I’ve developed a very thick skin, and that I take it all in stride; I refuse to play the victim card. And, after all, what other people think of me is none of my business.
But maybe my skin isn’t as thick as I like to think.
To wear drag is to celebrate all those feminine characteristics and qualities about which so many of us are tormented. Walking around in a dress and high heels, you really have to own your femininity. It’s about embracing what can otherwise be a point of apprehension or shame. For me, it was surprisingly difficult.
Looking at my drag-self in the mirror, I realized my own discomfort. As much as I like to think that the teasing, taunting and torment hasn’t affected me, I know that it has. As much as I wanted to celebrate my femininity through drag, I found it very challenging to do so – and it gave me a new-found respect for confident drag queens like Haley Star who do it so effortlessly.
Who knew that wearing a dress could be such a spiritually eye-opening experience?
Stay tuned for Davey Wavey’s drag unveiling this Thursday, January 19.
January 17, 2012 at 11:20 am
I’m so excited to see that
January 17, 2012 at 11:22 am
Some of what you shared here you talked with us about on the show. My co-host, the talented and hilarious Mrs. Kasha Davis was very touched by what you shared. A drag force to be reckoned with, it was wonderful to see how much she identified with your experience.
You bring a lot of laughter and light to this world, Davey. And while I liked how your voice was a little raspy the last time we spoke, I’ll take the everyday version over it anytime!
Now if I could just get the sneaker fetish nightmares to stop …
January 17, 2012 at 12:50 pm
The whole drag appeal alludes me…. never wanted to dress as a woman and never found drag performances appealing. There was only one drag performer that was outstanding and his name was Charles Pierce. He called himself a male actor and was often featured in shows in las Vegas. He took on the role of the women such as Bette Davis and Joan Crawford….at the same time and used his own voice. It was the nuance of the performance that gave the characters life. Many of the drag performers I have seen were only interested in putting on a dress and make-up and forgetting the craft of performing. I live in Europe most of the time each year where drag is not as much a part of gay life. There was one female impersonator who actually modeled in Philadelphia for magazines and runway shows. She was so good that she only wore couture clothes and never in the God aweful over the top, bad taste clothes that most drag performers wear. If it is an art form then approach it with some sort of taste level,
I am interested in thoughts, concepts and ideas that can get us through life…
January 17, 2012 at 1:07 pm
Well, look at it this way. “It’s a drag” can be a happy thought. Just like (and excuse this) “F” you!”" could be a wonderful idea. (I never understood it. I hate you. I loathe you and I want you to have sex. What?!) Words and ideas are what we make them. Open your mind and you open your heart (as I think.) We are so deverse and so alike at the same time. At a largely gay church I attended there was this transgender woman. The first I have ever known. She changed my life (not in THAT way) but because of her I am so comfortable around transgendered people now. We can influence each other and in some ways for the better. When we break down walls all of us are freed.
January 17, 2012 at 1:25 pm
I have been entertained by more than a few drag queens, but for me most come across as sophisticated clowns, caricatures of feminity with their over-the-top personnae. They aren’t for me, but laughter is a necessity and the gay world benefits from the laughs they provide. And if Haley is as sweet and loving as she seems, you are very fortunate to count such a gem among your best friends!
January 17, 2012 at 1:36 pm
Hey Davey:
A “D” huh? Sounds like you made a very hot woman..but, you’re still a hot man too!
January 17, 2012 at 1:37 pm
http://bilikeme2.blogspot.com/#outer-wrapper
January 18, 2012 at 12:55 am
Thanks
January 17, 2012 at 1:57 pm
I’ve dressed up in drag a bunch of times, competed in a few local pageants, and had fun with it. It was, for me, a way to get out of my head and deal with things by being someone else for a few hours. But my favourite part was always going back to being me.
There is a lot involved with drag that I just don’t care for. I find that a lot of queens will, over time, get nasty to just about anyone. There’s this idea of having to do it “right,” but there is no single version of “right.”
Now I just get dressed up for kicks every now and again, or if there is a charity/benefit show. I still appreciate it as a form of art. I just don’t feel the need to make it a defining factor in my life. I’m much more interested in my fitness and myself right now than I am in trying to entertain others.
January 17, 2012 at 2:36 pm
Most people should avoid judgement. Even on the comment boards on your blog many people make sweeping generalizations that they would vehemently defend themselves against. A very important rule of thumb is the tested and true: don’t judge unless you’ve walked in someone else’s shoes. Respect for our fellow human beings should be our ultimate goal, not our bodies, or our appearances, which eventually fade anyway.
January 17, 2012 at 6:56 pm
Opinions are not necessarily judgments…they voice ones view on life in many arenas. As far as giving up thoughts on posts, well, if you doidnt want them, then dont post. It is a social medium and as such, you open yourself and yhour comments to review.
January 17, 2012 at 2:43 pm
I find that when I dress in drag, it liberates me and I no longer feel that I have to hold back.
January 17, 2012 at 4:09 pm
I’m glad you tried this Davey. I still think high heels are atrocious torture for anyone, but I’m glad you tried it once at least.
January 17, 2012 at 5:07 pm
I can’t wait to see it~ Will be looking forward to Thursday now!
January 17, 2012 at 5:51 pm
I’m a straight female, but whenever I’ve moved to a new town, I look for the nearest drag bar. I find them fun, supportive communities, and very welcoming to the “cool straights.” Sadly right now I live over 60 miles from the nearest–sigh.
I can’t wait to see you, Davey–I’ll bet you are bee-you–tiful!
January 17, 2012 at 7:13 pm
U play the “victim card” more than anyone I know DAAVEY WAVEY
January 18, 2012 at 12:57 am
Davey like to have his clothes removed under duress, a friend tells me>
January 17, 2012 at 8:09 pm
I shall count the minutes till Thursday.
January 17, 2012 at 8:42 pm
I did drag at my University’s annual ‘Drag Show’ in honor of ‘Pride Week’ the week of National Coming Out Day. Such an amazing/interesting experience.
I was Isabella Vonsit Harda.
And I danced and lip-synced to ‘Born This Way’. Best night ever.
January 17, 2012 at 8:47 pm
This was probably one of my favorite blogs you have written because you were so pure and honest. Sometimes what you write about you seem kind of, IDK perfect. Or like you are masking reality with a BS mask to make things seems pretty. But this was a genuine reflection of your inner thoughts and insecurities. And it was kind of perfect.
January 17, 2012 at 11:00 pm
Sicko!
January 18, 2012 at 10:12 pm
My partner has the same ‘be feminine??’ reaction. The few times I’ve been done up properly, I’ve taken the opportunity to take a vacation and be the center of attention. Although, lashes and heels hurt after an hour.
And, I’m proud of my little A-cup.