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Nov
7
It’s not my job to convince you of anything.
November 7, 2009 | 39 Comments
Dear Universe,
I learned something today: I didn’t come into this world to convince anyone of anything. The things that I learn and the experiences that I have are my path and my path alone.
It isn’t my job to change anyone’s mind. In fact, a mind is very hard thing to change from the outside. It’s like trying to change a light bulb in your kitchen by standing in your front yard and reaching through the window. A mind is much more efficiently changed from the inside.
When I first discovered a place of immeasurable love, I couldn’t help but want to share it with the world. I can’t help but want to teach others how they can discover that place, too (after all, it’s only a thought away). I can’t help but want to put pen to paper and create a treasure map for other seekers. “This is what I found, and this is how I got there,” I want to say.
And so I do all these things.
And as I continue to explore this place of immeasurable love, and as I scratch the surface of this foreign yet entirely familiar land, I want to share my adventures with the world. Some fellow seekers may find usefulness in my words, lessons, advice and experiences. But a great many will not. It’s not their path and it’s not their time.
At the end of the day, it’s not my role to convince anyone of anything. Are my experiences true and meaningful? They are to me, and that is truly all that matters. It is my job to awaken myself, and myself alone.
A tremendous weight is lifted through this realization, and energy and effort that is otherwise spent in debate, pointless defensiveness and argument is freed for the pursuit of love, peace and consciousness.
Thank you for helping me realize this. But shit, why did you wait 26 years to tell me?
Your buddy,
DW
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Hi Davey! So I think you are great. The thousands of people (if not more) that respond to your blog and follow your tweets all do so by choice. The repeat visiotors, such as myself, take something away from what you put out there. Life is a journey meant to be shared together. So I got your tweet that said being Gay is a calling. If a blog online is also a calling, then there is nothing wrong with it, as long as that is what helps you feel more complete in your place in life and your own person. Cool?
You learned this lesson relatively early on in life. Those of us who have are fortunate. It feels good to have agreement from other people. But in the end you know what you have and it doesn’t matter if anyone else gets it. Keep enrolling people in your possibilities. The ones who are ready will understand – or at least seek to understand.
yeah, thats some realisation I keep struggling with
I came to the same conclusion a while ago but sometimes I can’t keep myself from trying to convince others anyway 
Well Davey I can tell that you are going throu a good path in life. I can only see what you share throu your videos and your blogs, but I’m aware that it is me who also needs to be awaken in my own light. I love the way you write, with such passion that can only be understood as love. I see you and the only thing I can think is I would love to be like you Davey Wavey!!!
I can not get to enlinghment trou your lifetime, but I can see the good and make my own path. Like I mention in many ocations: YOU ARE THE GLUE THAT KEEPS MANY OF US TOGETHER… The way that you write, and the awareness you bring to others makes me want to have the same, and to keep striving for something biger. Something like what you are creating. Because of you this world is more beautiful. And if it takes to take over one person at a time I’m all for it, and thats why I keep following your blogs around.
Davey Wavey I fucking love you!!! Because of you I have found a way to move forward, and to bring awareness to the world. I just wanted you to know that.
Believe & Smile… Siempre Sonrie!!!
Davey you are simply and yet profoundly loved. I hope you are aware of that. You are helping so many guys it is important that we tell you we love you!
There is something about your point that can’t be true in extreme scenarios.
Would you really say that if there was a genocide going on in your country, that you wouldn’t have some sort of an obligation to convince others around you that it should be stopped?
Davey, I read your blog everyday, and I have come to realize what a true philosopher you are. You don’t try to preach but often times what you say is something the we as individuls should think about. Thank you for planting the seeds that can help us grow in our own way.
It is very good for you that you realised that it is not your job to change anyones mind… one can (and should) change onley himself… I wish you everything best on your path… good luck
I think you have the right idea. It’s not your job to change anyone. It could be your job to provide the possibility of change to anyone who wants it. Thus your blog is the way to go. People who read it get exposed to the possibility of change and decide for themselves if they want to change. Thanks for being there for us. You’ve made a difference for me, at least. If you and your partner are ever down in San Diego, drop me an email and we can all do lunch or something.
Here Here. WTG Davey, you’re right
David,
I am sure that your blog is the best I ever read and I’m glad that I have discovered it.
If you never intended to convince anyone of anything, you convert lots of us, me first, to the “Davey Wavey mania”. It’s like the flu: extremely contagious!(lol)
I always wondered if you would have pursued your diary if you didn’t get so much ” fellow seekers”! (I feel like pretentious!).
bye,
I don’t want to say it too often but… I totally agree
with you!
bye,
Most of the time the problem is many people have expectations and assumptions of us and what we are “supposed” to do. But those are other peoples preconceived notions. PEOPLE, don’t let anyone put their shit on you.
I love your faith. In yourself. In love. One thing I wonder about though. You speak of a place of immeasurable love, of exploring it. Yet you travel the world, almost compulsively, and, it seems, alone. Isn’t the place of immeasurable love precisely where we are not alone, wherever we are?
Davey, it’s amazing the way internet and communications media gets people from all over the world to express themselves and share what they think it’s important for the world to know. I think you’ve got that idea very clear!
I began my comment this way because I live in Venezuela and I had no idea about this webpage (a friend of mine recommended it to me) and since two weeks until now I’ve been following your posts considering that I also like to hear and read about other people’s perspectives. I especially do when those points of view come from a person whose traditions and likes are very different from mine (if you know what I mean…)
Well, I also think that nobody is here on Earth to convince other people to do anything. Nevertheless, It’s a fact that some people have the ability to communicate better than others and that’s why some people let others to control and decide for them by “giving them advices” or by “telling them what to do”.
Although I also think that this world is full of greatness and people wiht good intentions, there must be a sense of dependency in the air that doesn’t allow the people to think and convince themselves of doing something.
Taking into account that we humans are social beings, it is and will be important to find that “place of immeasurable love” you talk about to realize for ourselves that we can’t be alone and be endlessly happy (well, you actually can but not forever). I think that’s why we need to share that joy with the world or the person you have by your side.
Keep writing the way you do, dude!… I have laughed out loud with some of your posts.
P.S. I apologize beforehand for my writing skills! haha
Davey, your post came at precisely the perfect time for me. I just had this exact conversation with my hubby over dinner. My daughter has made a decision that I feel is “wrong” but I am determined NOT to be the busybody mom who tries to tell her kids what to do. The mistake is hers to make and learn from. “No doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.”
Love your blog. I check in periodically because you and I think the same way on a lot of things. And you are very good at articulating “our” thoughts – better than I am.
Namaste, from a straight, 50-something grandmotherly-type Canadian chick.
Perhaps a useful question is why you feel you have to convince someone? Usually says more about you than any other facet of the issue. Also when its the right people, place and time it all happens effortlessly, no pushing, convincing, or have to make it happen etc. Personally I really enjoy your blog. Hope your path ends where you should be and where you want to be.;)
We never really have any obligation to do anything for anyone else in life… not needing to convince them is just one of those things.
Although I am aware of this, and sometimes act upon it, it doesn’t mean I don’t try… It doesn’t mean anyone shouldn’t try!
(although, i know you try even if you know)
It’s because we try even though we dont have to for the sake of others that make us great people
He really is helping (not just guys, he’s helping girls. too), but i think that it is good that he realised that it really is not his job to convience poeple… I like his post and videos, but one can change onley himself, by which i mean, that davey can’t change anyone if the will and wish to change doesn’t already exist in somone… but he surely can encourage for changes which i am thankful for
It is not his job to convience anyone… nor he could do so. He can, though, give a good example so he could, by doing that, eventualy change par of society… but that is still not his job…
he changed my mind, too… but i’m totally broke sooo… nothing of lunch… lol, just kiding… What you are saying is really great. It is not his job to change, but giving some example etc, he can infuence on changes in other people which is ok… and that way, he wont be disappointed if someone doesn’t change… which is also cool xD
we don’t have to be with someone to experience love… especially the Divine one. And wherever you are, you are not alone if you believe so…
“The one can have chance to evolve and learn only if he was given a chance to make mistakes.” Tagore
My faith in a divine one is not so strong. For now, Davey Wavey will have to lead me through the murk:-)
Davey you are awesome. But when you know something is wrong in then universe I think you have an obligation to share that concern and see about improving it. You make my world better just in the way you present yourself and your philosophy. Actions speak louder than words most of the time. Thanks for sharing yourself. And don’t just sit back and expect the world to be a better place without your positive words as well as deeds.
Davey Wavey..For some reason I don’t see the “thousands” of people that the first entry guy noticed answering your blog..It usually seems like under 100 if that much…I just kinda wonder why you don’t respond to gay guys like me…Am I the “little guy” in your life?..Love “your” David
My dear I THANK YOU DEARLY for everything.
Your inspiration is precious.
I am sending you energy.
Can you just smell the chocolate cake I’m baking now in my room, Paris, near the Eyffel tower? I know you can.
Best wishes,
Fabrice
Evang. So it is.
There is no need to convince. Just Being who you are is all any of us can do. It is that Being which convinces by it’s example of unconditional love. There are others with “eyes to see and ears to hear” who will need no convincing and others who will spend time (perhaps years) to “see and hear”. In my life as a teacher, years after having spent time with a student, I sometimes meet them and they say, “You know, I will always remember what you said, it changed my life.” I rarely remember what it was that I said.
So just go on Being end evolving as you are. I think I already said this on this blog. Forgive me, blog buddies, for repeating myself, “When a thief meets a saint, all he sees are the saint’s pockets.”
Thanks for sharing your wonderful Being with us.
Be well,
Davey Wavey,
You are truly not alone in asking that question, but if it has any meaning to you, I think it’s best to say that we learn all we can when we are able to.
You at the age of 26 show wisdom beyond your years, and the fact that wisdom can come from someone who is attractive and youthful, helps those who admire you benefit from your experiences.
I hope you really enjoy Australia and have an awesome tan with really un-blinding legs.
Cheers!
If we are connected then it is good that you share your journey. It seems that true effective meditation leads to sharing and experiencing more of the beauty that is there in living. Therefore, it is good to respond to our connection in life and also to share the journey toward truth and beauty discovered in that process. That is my thought listening to you, dear Davey.
same old same old
It feels I should not respond as to aspire to become somehow credentialed as if worthy to be respected as truly having original thought for the evaluation of another. It also feels that in the line of the saying that those who know the most say the least, I find there are presentations by the other who grasps to debate in tiny comments only seeming to show a great desire by their style as if to stand real tall in some desire to be of a higher status as if to be one who knows more. Therefore few words do not prove greater understanding in some places and times with my brothers and sisters of this world.
i once heard that a certain belief was going around that when a traveler meet an other on a mountain path he was meeting himself. if this was the truth then would he not try to improve that part of himself, share the wisdoms he had learned.
This is what I see you doing.
what life’s lesson is and why it is not done more is because of greed the masses want to feel that they are better than the man he meet on that path
It is everyone’s job to share what we have. we are not one but many, and all part of each other, find the song ( no man is an island) the word will speak the truths to those who are ready and some day everyone will be ready.
everyone that comes to this blog is part of Davey and take away with them part of Davey and parts of everyone who shares here.
LOVE YOU ALL
Davey – thank you for your sharing.
I had an experience in my old age that is so well stated by Robert Ingersoll that I’ll just quote him:
“ When I became convinced that the universe is natural, that all the ghosts and gods are myths,there entered into my brain, into my soul, into every drop of my blood
the sense, the feeling, the joy of freedom.
The walls of my prison crumbled and fell.
The dungeon was flooded with light
and all the bolts and bars and manacles became dust.
I was no longer a servant, a serf, or a slave.”
Robert G. Ingersoll
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Robert_G._Ingersoll
The Universe waits to reveal things to us when we are ready to understand them. 26 years isn’t so bad for this manifestation.
When I stop to think of how long I may have been trying to learn something, how many times I may have come back to finally understand a simple truth. It’s a little overwhelming.
I don’t know if the Universe has a face as we think of them, but if it does, I like to think it smiles just a bit when I finally understand one of the simple truths that the Universe has gently been guiding me towards for eons. So maybe the Universe is smiling at you a bit right now too.
Hey Davey,
I have a question for you then. How then do you deal with the pain. I see a man on the street begging for money or maybe even just food. I see a small business being closed down I go there every day and I know I want this person to succeed in the community because his business is REALLY for the community in his heart. I watch the news and there was a child who was raped by some stranger who picked her up on the way home from school. Or soldiers who are training to protect the members of society who want to improve the state of humanity being killed because of religious belief even though that religious belief is trying to create that same thing somewhere else. I know people die of starvation I know people die because they can’t afford medical care (not promoting or disagreeing with a universal medical care) I know that people enter our first world contries thinking it’s a free ride, I know when people don’t act things don’t get done, I know that some of the most powerfull people on the planet are just in it for the power and money and not to help bring a future of a healthy and progressive and productive society.
How does a person deal with this pain and just say “I’m only one person”, or say I only know my path and am not here to teach. I may be sheltered I may have a great and fantastic life not wanting or needing anything I can’t have. But when I look at the world and I see and hear of these things I can’t say I’m not a teacher. I may not have had the experiences of another person, but I have experience pain, in North America it can’t be much compared to the majority of the world. If my pain hurts that much, how can I not contirbute by being a teacher.
Kenneth Livingston
P.S. Maybe it’s called conscience
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onlineuniversalwork
The Center for Media Research has released a study by Vertical Response that shows just where many of these ‘Main Street’ players are going with their online dollars. The big winners: e-mail and social media. With only 3.8% of small business folks NOT planning on using e-mail marketing and with social media carrying the perception of being free (which they so rudely discover it is far from free) this should make some in the banner and search crowd a little wary.
onlineuniversalwork
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