Most Popular Posts
- i caught my neighbor spanking it (video)
- if this is wrong, i don't want to be right...
- here's the youtube video to go along with the pics
- i caught my neighbor spanking it
- Does size matter?
- A tale of two foreskins.
- about me.
- talky blog: Does size matter?
- Talky blog: Gay sex vs. straight sex...
- Davey Wavey, Jedi Master.
Jan
23
Lessons from Heidi Montag: What message are you sending the world?
January 23, 2010 | 58 Comments
In Sydney, I’ve been fortunate enough not to watch much television. This morning, while getting dressed, I happened to catch part of an interview with Heidi Montag.
Heidi is a 23 year-old star of MTV’s The Hills, and is the wife of fellow cast member Spencer Pratt. Over the last few years, Heidi has made countless headlines. Most recently, Heidi is in the news for undergoing 10 plastic surgeries.
The interviewer asked Heidi, “What is the message that you’re sending to young girls?” With a completely straight face, Heidi replied, “My message for young girls is that what counts is on the inside. It’s inner beauty that matters.”
Clearly, Heidi needs to get checked.
Receiving 10 plastic surgeries at age 23, and claiming that a triple-D cup size is too small, sends a very different message than the one Heidi intends. Somehow, Heidi has managed to overcome the cognitive dissonance that seems so obvious to the rest of us.
At the end of the day, it’s easy to pick on Heidi – but I think the real lesson is in applying this to our own lives. For all of us, it is worth examining the message that we are putting out to the world through our actions and thoughts (after-all, our thoughts are the seeds from which actions grow).
For most of us, there is likely a gap between our actual message and our intended message. I know this is true with me. Rather than try to close that gap through manipulated and twisted logic (like that employed by Heidi), it seems more productive to move our actions into alignment with our intentions.
So, I ask you, what message do you intend to send to the world? And what message are you actually sending?
Related Posts:
Comments
58 Comments
Davey Wavey’s Fitness Center
Connect With Davey Wavey
-
-
I’m not really sure what message I am sending to the world. Or necessarily, what message I would like to send. Maybe this ambivalence sends a confused message to the world?
Great insight. How sad that this poor girl felt the need to completely transform her appearance. She was really cute before.
She looked so pretty before her surgery! I feel so bad for her. She seems peer pressured.
I try every day to glean what kind of a message I am sending out. Sometimes I hit my mark, sometimes I don’t.
Hey Davey, I know that your message here is that inner beauty IS what’s best (Heidi sounds like she needs a drug test). I agree that what’s on the inside comes first, but I don’t agree that it’s the ONLY thing that matters.
We have to admit that people will go much farther in life if they do care about how they look or sound to other people. For example, although one may show up to a job interview the sweetest, smartest, caring person in the world, wearing a dirty tee shirt and sweats, they’re probably not going to win the job. If we don’t consider what other people think of us, how will we ever be able to adjust ourselves and learn and grow? Anyway that’s what I got out of this story
Isn’t the message subjective to the person receiving it?
This is a very timely post. I am full time bartender, and a part time nutritionist and student of traditional chinese medicine. While at work last night I had a similar thought; why am I helping people destroy themselves at night, and fix themselves during the day?
I have thought in the past that my healthful presence(and clear mind free from drugs or alcohol) in a destructive environment would allow people to see another way to live and if they had the courage I would help. It has happened a few times. I have also been exposed to a world of despair that I would have never seen. I feel that part of becoming a social worker should include working in a bar for 2 months as part of the training.
I have also experienced what I call cosmic sundays; it seems that I only get one customer on sunday, always different and always with a valuable lesson to show me.
However I now feel that I am sending a mixed message, and it is time to leave the bar, and allow people to destroy themselves, and not take me with them.
she was. but i feel that if she needed to completely change herself to feel good about herself then we should all respect her choice for her life.
but 10 surgeries is drastic, but if it was neede foe her then we should not make a huge deal about it. her life is under a microscope but u can only choose to look at it.
This is a perfect example of human behavior. We have been conditioned to not say what our true feelings and intentions are. Think about it. If you are having a horrible day and somebody asks you how you are doing, how likely are you to talk about your horrible day? At work, if you speak your honest opinions and mind to your bosses, you might lose your job. If you are a politician and you speak how you actually feel about things, you might not get elected.
The point I”m making is that people say what they think they should in a situation. It might be based on the truth and it might not.
What is really interesting to me is when people will keep saying these untruths again and again and actually start to believe it, despite it not being the truth. Heidi might just actually believe what she says.
Thus you can not take people’s words as truth, as Davey points out here. Everybody is an actor, and nobody says the truth to how they feel 100% of the time. That is if they want to survive in society.
Heidi is a cunt. There, I said it.
St. Francis sent his monks out with the instruction- Preach the gospel always, If necessary use words.
As quoted from Gandhi, “Be the change you wish to see in the world.”
I feel inadequate about my small breasts, too.
You know something- before you pass judgemet on Heidi (never heard about her before in my life, hones) – I think there are few questions you could ask yourself…
Like…
What message are YOU sending your readers (not out of malice) with you constant underwear appearance.
Pretty people with toned body who preach about inner beuty – pfffft.
It’s like Donalfd Trump telling me that money doesnt count and a Falcon Studio model claiming tat size doesnt matter.
We both know what would happe to your followship if you put a shirt on for 6 months. I am not telling you to do it, just advising to have some humble pie for dinner tonight…
^Then I would say good riddance to the people that stay for his nipples.
Oh please, your criticising Heidi? Bit rich coming from you isn’t it? You shamelessly capitalise on your looks/image.
This blog would nearly be as popular but for your image. I propose a challenge: stop putting up images of yourself for a period of 5 years and see how popular this blog and your various business off shoots become.
If inner beauty is all that really matters, as you repeatedly claim, then taking these things away won’t matter.
Yes, this blog entry is a rich vein to mine, but if any of us were to blog about our lives and our beliefs to this degree–and post revealing photographs and videos as well–we, too, would expose our inner inconsistencies and vulnerabilities. It would be impossible to live so publicly and do otherwise.
The stone is polished by tumbling along the river bed.
I think that if you have inner beauty that is mirrored on the outside, im not saying everyone with muscles and a big dick has inner beauty. However I am saying that if you live in peace and love, then your eyes will beam, your voice will sound like sweet music, your smile will send love to all that see it, and you will take better care of your body which will result in outer beauty x100.
Have you noticed that that falcon models eyes look dead, his smile forced or that they have photoshopped his skin, teeth and dick to be smoother, whiter and bigger. And oh my are those butt implants?
You’re sending a message that Heidi Montag is somehow relevant… I think everyone should ignore her. I haven’t seen her before or even after her surgery. To me she is nobody.
She is not someone anyone needs to compare themselves to.
Dave, I think you are great, but I agree with Rory on that.
You are our Heidi Montag in some way or another…
Big hug!
Davey Wavey…I often think about what message you are trying to send..especially todays message..as you seem to try to show that your message is on the OUTside by always appearing with shirt off and this week in a speedo…so do you want us to see your inside message or your OUTside message?..you are one confusing guy!…Love “your” David
and if cutting herself…also
made her “feel real good about herself”…
should we respect that choice for her life too?
Believe it ot not, I was called Davey Wavey by my mother when I but a little boy.
I do hope you’re not attached!
And I was called Davey Wavey by my mother when I was but a little boy.
I do hope you’re not attached…
Beautifully-stated and “to-the-point,” Fluffy Bri. i couldn’t-agree-more with Davey and you. Love and Peace to All, – - – davvi
“No one is available to take your message. Please leave a detailed message at the beep.
Have a nice day.”
After my having red(read) all further comments, i’m-now: “confused-as-a-termite in-a-yoyo!” Will some one “please help-me?!” Thanx-ahead-of-time
, – - – davvi ps: example- Is there supposed2be something-Wrong with having one’s “Outer-Looks” enhanced?!?! … … Is it Wrong 4 Davey 2show himself in “All” his glory 2all-of-us??
Provocative thing to think about. What message do I send? I think it’s something like, “If I spend some time with you I will be nice, funny, pleasant, insightful depending on what you want to talk about, helpful if I can, but I prefer to be alone. I don’t bother others and I ask not to be bothered.” Weird message, but I think that captures me.
With that, I think you sent a message that individuality and patience are traits that society has often confused with ambivalence.
It took me a couple of decades to learn what patience is and how to make some of my own. A quickly baked cake usually tastes raw or burnt somewhere.
Cheers!
To whom are you referring, Vance? John or me. … … And evidentally, “stupid-me” has still-failed to detect the answers to my 2questions i asked. … … Once-again, Thanx-ahead-of-time, – - – davvi
To whom are you referring, Vance? John or me. … … And evidentally, “stupid-me” has still-failed to detect the answers to my 2questions i asked. And John i too like being-alone and not-being-bothered and “Not-bothering-anyone”, although i like to help people out, in any way possible! i Hope i’m Not-bothering anyone heah(here)?! … … Once-again, Thanx-ahead-of-time, – - – davvi
There is always someone ready to take ‘pot shots’ and today it’s you, James. What is your problem?
Davvi: my official quote of the day is going to be “I’m as confused as a termite in a yo-yo.” LMFrigginAO!
Is there something wrong with enhancing outer beauty? Well let’s see. How much do people spend on make up, hair, clothes(big one here), dieting to the point of starvation and death, working out to extremes. And if that isn’t enough, what about being trendy to fit in and be popular. Oooo. A very expensive sports car you can’t afford, a 500,000 house you can’t afford.
And I guaruntee that all these people mocking Heidi and now Davey have looked at someone else at some point and made fun of something that wasn’t good enough. Let’s see, too fat, no ass, ugly shoes, bad hair, ugly car, they take the BUS!!!
Gimme a break folks! They are no worse than anybody else because WE ALL DO IT AT SOME POINT! There is nothing wrong with trying to improve your appearence, and some people take it to extremes. But the real problem here is that they feel that they have to do it in the first place! All the people being judgemental and critical here would be the first one to call her ugly!
And if I was as hot as Davey who obviously works his ass off to look that way. I would walk around with my shirt off too! I used to be that trim and muscled up and I did it too! But I guaruntee all you people mocking Davey for always having his shirt off would also make fun of him if he had his shirt off and weighed 300lbs. You would say “why would he allow himself to be seen when he looks like that.”
I repeat. The true problem here is that people feel they need to go through all this so they will feel acceptable in a judgemental society. Not that someone got surgery. She is right, internal beauty is the most important, in the long run. But how are you gonna get someone to give you the time of day? Without that does it even matter?
Hugo, what I’m gleaning from your post is that you bartend to support yourself while you are building your business as a nutritionist and studying Chinese medicine. There is nothing wrong in that. As a bartender, you are also offering a service, one that fosters a sense of community and belonging for your patrons. While we all know how harmful alcohol can be, we also have to recognize that it is the abuse of something that makes it harmful, not the use. The patrons can just as easily ask you for a coke as they can for a rum and coke. Their choice, and one we ethically must respect. Part of your job is to nurture those patrons by keeping track of how much alcohol they consume, and cut them off when you recognize they have had too much. That is the best you can do. Another way to look at it is that for everyone you serve in a night, only a small percentage are the ones you’ll need to keep an eye on. Hope this helps.
To Kit:
I love what you said. And as far as the choice of coke or rum and coke I expanded that as a server. When they would ask for coke I occasionally asked if they wanted a bump or a line. This was all based on reading my guests to meet their needs.
Lmao!
Seriously though! I love what you said!
Fluffybri, thank you for your “compliment” in reference2my expression of degree-of-confusion. And you’ve certainly-answered my “?” regarding “overall looks-enhancement, so “thank-You So-Very-Muchy
!! i also assume that you are with-me in agreeing that there’s “Nothing-Wrong!” about the-ways in which Davey displays-himself on his blog and/or in his videos. Am i totally “non-incorrect in my assumption??” Thanx2All; Love and Peace, – - – davvi
yes-change for the better-not the obnoxious.enhancing breasts-for fake-looking breasts-it looks horrible.
It would be interesting to find out the message I send out perhaps it is not the same one I think I send out either, like Heidi
Sophia Petrillo: It’s a shame to do all that work and keep that hair-do.
It’s none of our business what other people think of us.
That’s the message for today…..
FluffyBri, thank-you for your “compliment” in reference 2my d
FluffyBri, thank-you for your “compliment” in reference 2my degree-of-confusion, as i feel honored by-you. And you’ve “certainly-answered” my question referencing “overall-looks-enhancement,” so “Thank-You So-Very-Muchy
!” i also assume that you’re with-me in agreeing that there’s “Nothing-Wrong” about the-ways Davey presents-himself to us on his blog and/or videos! Am i “totally non-incorrect” in my assumption, FluffyBri?? … Thanx-again to Davey, you and all others-here for their help. … Love and Peace to-All, – - – davvi
self improvement should be just that SELF-improvement. It should come from within you and if you have the tenacity to make it happen then go for it. It is when you feel “should” improve yourself because others tell you to. I heard a story about a guy who was nerdy and meek, but one day he decided to get a new tie, then he got a hair cut, people started noticing him at work, then started working out and soon enough he got a promotion then started a business. It ended up being steve jobs or something. What Im saying is that the change happened inside first and the outside followed, and he had to work at it to make it happen.
Very-well-stated, hugo! … And i hope everyone-else will-remember that it’s “Not-a-sin” for guys to wanna-enhance-themselves, as-well, as it’s-not-Only women whom-experience these-desires!! Thanx, Hugo. Love and Peace to All, – - – davvi
Hey Davey,
The message I want to send to the world is that having integrity and being honest all of the time is not to high a standard to have. This world gives people the message that to have high moral standards in the world is not possible and that you definately will not find a lucrutive life style with morals like that. The truth is that that is the lie. The only reason people think that having high moral standards is not possible is because everyone keeps making excusses for everyone. Well they only did it once. Oh, they weren’t thinking for themselves. etc. etc.
I think though the message I send out to people is that I’m a sucker, because I will unconditionally trust someone till they show me different. And because when I see people just one example: talk dirty to someone who doesn’t appreciate it and they try to make it sound like it wasn’t so bad when I know their insides are just turning. And I say that’s creepy if I were you I would give that person ice and not speak to them again. Because she made clear she did not find it acceptable. Yet she’s like oh that’s just _____anites like that somehow makes it acceptable.
Kenneth R. Livingston
Thanks for the advice, Vance!
- Keith
Or, I should say “Cheers!” since I did just get back from a 3 month stay in London!
Good blog. I wrote something similar on my Facebook when I saw her say that.
Well he is totally right though. Why is it Davey can point it out about someone else but someone else cant point it out about Davey?
I didnt quite follow that last part, but when I see people like you from an outsiders perspective, I dont see a sucker I see a really good person who is doing good, and if everyone were like that the world would be such a better place. I see you and it makes me want to be a better person. So dont be hard on yourself.
I dont think Davey reads our responses BC I never see him respond too much. This is probably more like a Ill out some stuff up and write some things and make money off of people, who really cares. But if he does see it, notice there is a theme to most everyones comments. IT seems someone doesnt practice what they preach, and i would like to know what he thinks of that.
garrett: i’m-now, once-again, “Confused-as-a-termite-in-a yo-yo!” … … …
‘?? … :-[‘?? Stupid-me, i-guess. … But, – like, – ahh, which-one-of your posts do you intend to-apply to-Davey?? The “Negative” or the “Positive” posts. i do-NOT understand, please help-me. Thanx-n-advance!, _ _ _ davvi PS: Depending upon numbah and length of comments posted at various dates, times etc., Davey can’t-”Always” have enuf(enough)-tym(time) to read-them-”All.” Nevertheless, he does-read-”Many” of our posts. Hence, Davey’s: “The Commenter(s) Of The Week Feature”. And on that same-list i’ve seen you,garrett as-well-as: Fluffybri, Mosaic Dave, Jack ofTheUK, Michael, David in Toronto, Cliveey, TJ, Eric, gngen, Hilary, DocTgo, Darryl, Coach Lance, David in Jerzzy, Joan, Mike, Jimmy-O, Cookie, Erick, hugo, Dave, Leland, Jack, gene, Eduardo, Derrick, Jerry, Jenny; … … to name just-a-few among many-many!! … … Thank-you, Garrett
First off: Can you type normal?? You can barely understand what you are trying to say with the ” ” and the ( ) and all that. Thats not how you are supposed to type. thanks in advance!
Second they were both meant for him. He makes a great point. However, he just falls victim to the point he is trying to make and is a hypocrite about it.
Also, I rarely visit this site anymore. But when I do comment about something, someone else comments, then I comment back and so on. Which is why I am probably the commenter or w/e it is. I like to watch his videos.
And on the same note, I think a lot of what he says is great advice and can help people become better people. Just, over the time I have been reading his blogs, I dont know if he practice what he preaches. And if you look at everyone elses comment, I am not the only one.
And PS: What does it matter if I was a commenter of the week? DO you have a point or….?
Thanx4urReply, garrett. … Davey is-NOT a hypocrite! But whatever!? … You were on “the list” because you had a good insightful, etc post, like the many-others i named. … i apologize 4my having been “difficult2understand.” L and P, – - – davvi
If one doctor did all those surgeries he should be brought up before the board. On “the View” Some one said it was something like purging your genectics and dissing anyone related to you. Scott Thorenson said Liberace wanted him to facial surgeries to resemble him. Thankfully for him and us he didn’t. That alone deserves the money he got from him when he “divorced.” Filed under “Way too creepy for words.”
The only list that matters is the one your supposedly on to see the entertainers backstage. I’ve asked to see such list. “Never mind you’re on it. (making even THAT irrelevent.) I especially like (not) all the posts with “me first”
Did you hear about The Jewish Princess seen doing a line of aspartame because she wanted Diet Coke?
Hey Davey,
I feel ashamed for Heidi. We are all born perfect I don’t care where you live what class you live by, what your career, who your friends are, IF you were raised right you would genuinely know with every fiber of your being that we are all born entirely perfect. Heidi’s actions are a mutilation of perfection, to look at your own face and see someone elses, however conscious or unconscious will destroy her self esteem and her sense of self worth for the rest of her life. She just wrote herself a jail sentence to have a handicapped sense of self esteem and self worth for the rest of her life. In a way without dieing she killed herself!
Kenneth R. Livingston
Heidi needs to get off the dope and get rid of spencer go back to colorada and hibernate noone wants you around you are so stupid trying to trick him into a baby having a baby when you have no morals you are a fake ridiculous joke you looked better before your surgeries and you have no idea what an idiot you sound like 100% of the time you are sending the wrong message to kids although I think most kids are smarter than you and know your a clown loser!