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January 31, 2011
by Davey Wavey

My Anniversary: 10 Years of Being Out.

Coming out of the closet is a process.

First, there was coming out to myself. While seemingly obvious, it was one of the largest hurdles to surmount.

Then, when I was 16, I told a handful of my closest friends that I’m gay.

On the night of January 29, 2001, I came out to my mom. It was one of the most difficult things that I’ve ever done. And maybe that means that my life has been incredibly easy – or maybe it means that coming out is really that hard. In my mind, there was a very real possibility that my mother would disown me. In truth, you really can never tell how someone will react – and I was very, very scared.

Over the years, I’ve heard the full spectrum of coming out stories. Some parents are amazingly supportive, while others think nothing of kicking their children to the street. My parents were somewhere in the middle; they were upset, but their love for me was unshaken.

My parents have come a long way since 2001 (in fact, my mother called me on Saturday night to remind me that it’s my 10-year coming out anniversary), and looking back on the last decade, an obvious lesson stands out to me: People really can change. Maybe not all of them, but definitely some of them. I never expected my dad to espouse to importance of marriage equality to his shellfishing buddies, but that’s exactly what he did last weekend.

It took me 16 or 17 years to come to terms with my sexuality, and my parents have done it in less than 10. Good for them.


  1. Davide,

    Were you the president of your high school debate team by any chance?

  2. Roger,

    That’s a good one, but no…but was vice president of the student body at my all-male Catholic high school “go Moeller” and voted “most spirited”..does this count? but to answer your question…I was not. Let me explain something if I may. When you grow up in a large Italian family you have to stand your ground or you never survive..basic instincts to defend your position.

    Clearly I am ‘outside the box’ kinda thinker..and this is how I like it…I refuse to painted into a corner or placed into a box…I do realize my opinions and my ways might offend others but that’s the nature of the beast..

    Okay see you, ciao

  3. OMG! what a great idea to celebrate that, it had not ocurr to me, congrats! let the next 10 year be better

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