A lifetime ago, we talked about your biggest “turn ons.” Today, I want to know:
What is your number one biggest turn off ever?
Leave your answer in the comments. Lord knows, I have a growing list.
A lifetime ago, we talked about your biggest “turn ons.” Today, I want to know:
What is your number one biggest turn off ever?
Leave your answer in the comments. Lord knows, I have a growing list.
March 30, 2009 at 1:34 am
People who have “best friends.” You can’t date someone who has this “best friend” and come first. You’ll always be second.
Friends are great. Platonic love is a fantastic thing, but in the end shouldn’t come before romantic love.
March 30, 2009 at 1:37 am
Also smoking, drugs in general, and drinking to get drunk. Whine with good dinner is great. Drinking to get drunk is not.
March 30, 2009 at 4:10 am
That we even have turn-offs.
March 30, 2009 at 5:38 am
A Guy that is too scared to ever ‘come out’ and uses it as a crutch to hinder any relationship from going somewhere.
March 30, 2009 at 6:38 am
Desperation – feeling unloved and unvalued
help cause that behaviour.
A feeling of hopelessness.
So although it is pretty bad behaviour try
to understand and help people like that.
The natural reaction is to give them a hard time….
March 30, 2009 at 6:41 am
When people behave like that it is isolation
and feeling marginalise dand hopeless
that cause it.
It is better to act and try to stop them
feeling that way than to think of them as assholes.
Don’t make them feel even more excluded…
it only reinforces the bad behaviour.
March 30, 2009 at 7:59 am
The N word.
March 30, 2009 at 3:03 pm
I’ve just realized that the biggest turn-off dudes at the seminary here are the following:
The guys who refuse to circle jerk with us in the showers.
The ones who want their c**k’s sucked but are afraid to ask.
The ones who pretend that they are making a big sacrifice by vowing not to marry women– they usually say this while being f****d.
The dudes who masturbate under other seminarian’s pillows and leave the surprise c*m there.
The guys who refuse to use condoms because the Pope doesn’t approve!!!
The large number who remind us daily that Davey Wavey wanted to be a priest but didn’t join the seminary!
The dudes who walk into a shower room of 25 other naked seminarians and scream “Buffet” over and over!
Dominus vobiscum!
March 30, 2009 at 5:17 pm
I have a few turn-offs:
1. Smoking
2. People who are unintelligent or who are just ignorant.
3. People who are so attached to their own opinions that they deride others for thinking differently.
4. People who torture themselves because they don’t feel they deserve happiness.
5. People who are victims.
March 30, 2009 at 5:46 pm
One of my turn offs is a young guy that thinks that life, or at least sexy gay life ends at 30. Well children I am 55 and at gay.matchmaker.com I have had 336 view my profile and 17 including guys in their 20′s mark me as their favorite. Young guys are cute but lousy lovers. I am more attracted to men than boys. Boys are usually selfish lovers and don’t care about their partner. My popularity partly stems from good genetics. All the men in my family look young and are very handsome I don’ have any grey hair yet but when I do it will be silver and I will look more fabulous than now. Most people guess me to be 35 to 40. I am trim and neat and intelligent and an experienced lover. I feel sorry for the boys of this generation. all to soon they will pass into their thirties and feel lost and hopeless because they have built their self esteem on being young. I am from the hippie generation we rejected all that crap so as I aged I continued to find my center not in the past or the future but in the now. We learned some things in those communes in those books in that open sex. I learned things then that Davey is teaching now. Davey could have been one of us. I would have shared my waterbed with him not being impressed by him. Not worshipping him he is just another man like me.He is as pretty as me. I am as pretty as him we all are beautiful. God is in us. We are God. Reject your comparisons that you are better or worse than someone else.
Tony in Mexico
March 31, 2009 at 4:04 am
Equally a turm off are smug guys.
We dp not all get dealt a happy situation in life.
We are not all able bodied.
We do not all look youthful throughout our life.
We have not all had lives without stress.
Many have been through major emmotional turmoil
with the break up of relationships that meant
a lot to them.
Manyhave regrets at having hurt someone else.
Davey Wavey has done a brill job with these clips.
He really does provide an emmotionally inteligent
alternative to the “prissy” “Im so young and beautiful”
(and I will alwaysw be young won’t I?) the attitude
that is prevalent in some areas on teh gay scene.
He speaks of Karma – which is refreshing.
But I wonder whether it will hold for him
when he goes thru the troubles and struggles of life.
It is good that he has centred on charity and being
a giving person.
But it does worry that this may just be a commercial
site with a sexy likeable guy fronting it.
Good luck to him for his enterprise though.
We badly need such entrepreneurs if we are to
have any sort of community life.
But we also need people who love and care for others.
March 31, 2009 at 7:04 am
I am blessed to have lived a life although filled with troubles and pain. Illness and boundries. Hep. C from sharing syringes, diabetes from bad genetics, equally chronic migraines. Atherosclerosis in my 100% blocked carotid needing surgical bypass in 2 weeks,Multiple Sclerosis, Testicular cancer,cardiac insufficiency, hypertension, a stroke leaving my left arm and leg numb so I can’t drive,clinical depression, hardening cerebral arteries/with calcium deposits, seeing clusters of specialist physicians prescribing handfuls of medicines, I have not lost my joy in living,loving, f*****g, my youth nor my libido a man half my age would crack under the strain I carry everyday. All this goes to show my philosophy of We are one, we are God. We need not carry our burdens alone. The Universe is me and carries my burden and me along I need not be alarmed. I can rest in my own beauty.
I am stronger for these trials than I was before, is a true working philosophy If you come to me I can show you medical records and you can see my joy we can make love. We can feel the love of the universe all around us. No one gets out alive, eventually one of my illnesses will take my life, that is the way. It can’t steal my joy, my simple happiness sucking c**k. Eventually my beauty shall dim and none shall fight for my favors as they still do. My joy shall be intact. Perhaps I will have a husband who will still see my youthfulness. Loving me still. Or perhaps I shall die still beautiful, I am not afraid I have died before, It’s like an orgasm with infinite release and infinite pleasure. In my online gay matchmaker servous. The most desirable man has come to haunt my profile. He is the one everyone wants. He is a bodybuider intelectual who won’t answer requests from men looking for hook-ups He wants a passive intellectual bottom A non smoker a nondrinker he never goes to clubs he is extremly health concious. He is my dream husband he’s beautiful, I confident in my beauty I have never had to remain alone for long the perfect person always comes along Others always envy my lovers but I dared not hope for this man. But he came to me last night he marked me as his favorite. Sending messages of his interest in me. I am amazed. He is 39 and makes good money. Today I will answer him. I will give him permission to come visit me or send for me to come to him. I am as happy as I was with my first love. I think He will be my last love. His motivation is marriage. Be happy with me brothers.
Anthony in Mexico
March 31, 2009 at 9:18 am
Hello,
I am really sorry to hear of all your troubles.
Be careful of placing too much hope in people.
My own belief is in the self sacrificial love, as shown by Jesus.
It is just unfortunate that so many of His followers present
such a sad idea of what He was about.
You have done really well to not turn sad and bitter.
Sexual obsession is no answer though.
Neither, on its own, is romantic love.
Jesus spoke of bringing a “life more abundant” it meant
the fullness of life.
It did not mean morbid dreary puritanism.
And it did not mean getting ever more uncut c***s to enjoy.
It meant every aspect of our lives in balance, with real love and care
for othe rpeople at the centre,,,, and a bit of appreciation to
God for all we have been given.
Take care.
I hope your helath improves soon.
March 30, 2009 at 11:40 pm
I would love to know more about Anthony Carlson. I am also fit, intelligent, experienced and a thoughtful lover. I get turned on by turning on the man I am with. I am the oppopsite of a narcissist. I am also taken to be much younger than I really am. Anthony Carlson, send me your email address and you will get my picture. We have loads in common. ciao seanmagic1964@yahoo.com
March 31, 2009 at 9:59 am
Thank you for your kind words and warnings cliveey. I am an ordained Minister of the Gospel. I got my Associates degree in Theology at Christ for the Nations in Dallas TX. I have served as pastor and missionary of a church for 8 years. I am a student of the scriptures. I have been called apart from the church as John the Baptist was for Revelation. And in this time The Lord has shown me that He made me beautifuly and perfectly. I don’t need to change to please Him much less you. Forgive me for exagerating for literary liscence. I don’t spend my days sucking c***s. As charming as that would be. I spend much more time in prayer and meditation and online lately. My life is full and abundant. I have spent many hours arguing and playing with scriptural quotes. The word of God is a two edged sword and playing with it someone can get cut and that is not fun.
So I refuse to play this one-upmanship game with you. Thankyou for wishing me well. MY Yoke is easy and my burden is light because another helps me carry it.Peace be unto you.
March 31, 2009 at 1:35 pm
Welll I hope all is well with you.
Physically emotionally – whatever.
I certainly do not argue with you
for one upamnaship, that would be dreary.
Worse stillI would not want to hurt you
emotionally.
I only “argue” with you as I do with myself.
I certainly cannot sit in judgement on anyone.
The only thing I judge is ideas.
But it is caring for people that is important.
So I just hope your life is happy and will be
as pain free as posssible.
March 31, 2009 at 2:11 pm
WELL, it hasn’T BEEN SAID YET—SURPRISINGLY, BUT THE BIGGEST TURN-OFFS AND THE BIGGEST FRAUDS IN THE GAY COMMUNITY ARE THOSE GUYS WHO REFUSE TO DATE GUYS WHO ADMIT TO BEING HIV POSITIVE (AND HOW MANY OF THEM DO LIE BECAUSE OF THE STIGMA OTHERS PUT ON IT??). AND THOSE WHO MAKE JOKING AND SARCASTIC COMMENTS ABOUT GUYS WITH AIDS! THE NEXT WAVE IS COMING, AND WON’T YOU BE SURPRISED TO BE ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE FENCE????
March 31, 2009 at 4:28 pm
I would date a HIV+ Man. I don’ think that I would have sex with him but maybe if I fell in love with him. I would kiss him and hold him and if the time came for intimacy I would mutually masterbate with him. I would sleep with him and be open to loving him.I am not afraid of HIV. I would expect him to be honest with me but not be surprised if I found out he had lied. I had Candida infection in my mouth and thought that I was HIV+ for several years. But at my hospital. They routinly check for HIV and I was surprised I was neg. Everytime I see a new specialist they order a HIV test I think because I have HEP.C and it can only be caught by blood contact so many HCV (HEPC) are also infected with HIV so I have been checked about 9 times so I am definitly HIV- But I remember the fear I had with the Candida which turns out to be a symptom of HCV too. So I have great compassion for our infected brothers.I want to hold them all.
March 31, 2009 at 5:41 pm
You sound like a very confused person! There are
just so many HIV Positive dudes out there who want
a dude who will hold them, kiss them and have mutual mastrurbation with them!
As for the rest of your response, how could you have a doctor and THINK you were
HIV Positive for several years? Candida is a “sign” they check out pretty fast.
I think you mean well, but any self-respecting HIV Positive dude would tell you to
f**k off!
March 31, 2009 at 5:50 pm
Why is catching Hiv any ore shameful
than catching a cold?
They are both viruses.
Must admit I would be nervous thogh.
I am just so glad it is not me at present.
Things could have been so very different.
The medication and the ilness are often
not easy to deal with.
Alos it is not easy knowing that
the partner, you love,could suffer.
March 31, 2009 at 6:14 pm
I din’t have a doctor when I thought I had HIV I was too afraid to find out I live in Mexico. A few weeks ago I was in the hospital for a study preparing for a carotid bypass operation that is coming up soon. I was talking to an orderly and I said something about having HCV (hepC) when I got back from my study they had moved all my things to an isolation room and said something about that they had sprayed my room for bugs so they moved me. Turns out the orderly thought I said HIV instead of HCV so they whisked me away. These are health professionals. Here it is like it was in the 80s in the USA. The question was why no one had mentioned as a turn off HIV+ and that to me is not a turn off it makes me sad. I don’t know what a self respecting HIV+ dude would think of my response and why he would tell me to f**k off. I imagine thast they lead pretty lonely lives. And If I led a lonely life I would want someone to hold me and make love to me, wouldn’t you? Here in Mexico at least in my metropolitan area of about 2 million people I haven’t met any out gays much less out HIV+ people. I know in the USA it is much different I am from there
I grew up in Kansas City and Denver. but that was before the aids epidemic. Why are you so hostile toward me? I’m just saying things how I see them. Are you this hostile toward Davey? I think his philosophy is similar to mine.
April 2, 2009 at 8:19 am
Don’t worry man, DickerBoy has been an abusive prick to everyone for days. No reasonable person would tell you to f**k off.
March 31, 2009 at 10:46 pm
Anthony… It’s all lots of words you speak, BUT I would have to say that making love to a guy who is HIV Positive just isn’t characterized by jerking each other off– as romantic and compassionate and you seem to believe that is!
April 2, 2009 at 11:00 am
Take care of yourself Dickerboy.
You can still have a fun life and everything.
But you do need to take care of yourself.
It is a deciding factor.
I feel so annoyed at the stupidity of people
who bare back.
We are not children.
No use acting stupid then wondering why the
straight world lack respect for us.
But then lots of them are pretty daft too.
Just eat and keep healthy eh.
Please.
April 3, 2009 at 8:09 am
Biggest? Hhhmm … maybe people who judge other people based on turn-offs?
April 12, 2009 at 7:45 pm
So, I was just wondering, what should you do about overprotective straight friends? Does anyone else have this problem?
April 13, 2009 at 3:26 am
Depends – do you live in a viloent neighbourhood?
*
If you’re under 21 perhaps they want to avoid you
being taken advantage of.
Loads of guys will npretend to hang on to every
word you say, to be a real friend, to be wanting
a life long partner etc, just to get your trousers down.
The trouble is the arrogant b******s will then ignore
you, even be rude to you, the next time they see you.
Getting you in bede will just be something to brag about.
**
But in the end you hav eto tell your friends that you
“YOU WILL LEARN BY MAKING YOUR OWN MISTAKES”.
*
If you do that don’t complain when you get hurt,
even badly taken advantage of and really hurt.
*
We all resent people who try to protect us, it is a
natural thing for loyal friends to do.
Much harder is forcing ourselves to move out
of our “confort zone” and do something physical
or move into a different social setting that
frightens us.
So why not try abseiling or sequence dancing or
taking a lead organising role in something.
Something you would not normally do that is
a real challenge.
Then they may think of you differently.
April 25, 2009 at 5:24 pm
MY biggest turn off is cockiness/big ego
April 25, 2009 at 5:54 pm
cockiness/big ego, matched with big ability or accomplishment and something to crow about is a real turn on for me. I say blow your horn if you got something to show. if it’s empty sound then shutup.
July 29, 2010 at 7:48 pm
Anthonly are you latin? You said you live in Mexico. Sorry if you don’t like uncut guys. My opinion is guys that are circumcised should have sex with other circumcised. Latin men and other uncut guys should have sex with each other only. It’s so nice when I have sex with another Latino because since all Latinos are uncut there are no surprises. We don’t have to pretend and get prepared, just be spontaneous. We know what to expect: a nice musty wet c**k head when you pull the foreskin back. If there is cheese then that’s fine! I am tired of being discrimated by other cut guys.
October 26, 2010 at 12:49 am
that sounds kind of gross dude
October 26, 2010 at 12:51 am
this is funny
October 26, 2010 at 1:06 am
guys dont get that option
October 26, 2010 at 1:07 am
how did you control the eating?
October 26, 2010 at 1:09 am
thx for the heads up about young boys
October 26, 2010 at 1:28 am
you block bad comments davey?