Years ago, when I was working for one of the nation’s leading LGBT groups, I was surprised by the amount of unfriendly competition and animosity between the various gay rights organizations. I remember thinking: If we can’t even play nice with each other, how in the world are we going to lead our movement forward?
But maybe I shouldn’t be surprised. Because on a micro level, there’s so much infighting and vertical aggression within our own community. Just think of all the times you’ve seen gay people rip each other apart and down (either online or in the real world) – complete with name calling and slurs.
At the end of the day, we’re all on the same team. We’re all trying to live our lives, create happiness for ourselves and our loved ones, and do the best we can with what we’ve got. And that’s not even a gay thing so much as it is a human thing.
As this planet hurls itself through time and space into a new year, I think it’s important to remember that we’re all in this together.
Let’s be kind.
December 28, 2011 at 10:34 am
This is very true, we’re all about equal rights yet behind closed doors and sometimes even out in public we’ll tear one another down. No wonder the bigots are winning. Its simple really, don’t like each other? Shut up.
December 28, 2011 at 11:29 am
Davey – I agree with your sentiments. It’s a human-rights thing… why must we spend so much energy putting down others? However – in the spirit of your “if you see something, say something” post from the other day – haven’t you really sunk to that level with the title of the post – propagating the “troll” reference?
December 28, 2011 at 12:44 pm
Hi Davey and All,
I hope we’re all having a wonderful Holiday Season! While I haven’t been referred to as a “Troll” yet, I have heard the term used as a descriptor of the customers of one of the clubs that I frequent. I too find the term hurtful … I didn’t set out to become a Troll and do what I can to preserve the positive aspects of my “physical” manifestation on this plane of existence. It is unfortunate that we have yet to develop the ability to peer into the beauty of the soul before rendering judgment of the whole based on outward appearance. Those physically challenged and/or disfigured are capable of bringing beauty and pleasure through other outlets and means. I say, “Feel free to feed the Troll”, you just might be surprised with a beautiful gift. Wishing us all a Happy and Successful 2012!
December 28, 2011 at 2:47 pm
not sure what this bloq entry has to do with trolls . . .
December 28, 2011 at 2:51 pm
i know and have heard of personal attacks on organisations and lgbt civil rights groups.instead of this negative energy-look for common ground-and move forward.together and collectively forward progress will be made easier-and less people will feel discouraged.its worked in the past-and will in the future.
December 28, 2011 at 3:11 pm
This is so real. In my coming out process I came out to some gay people and they laughed at me and just turned their backs on me. There was a close friend who even said that if I wanted to have gay sex for the first time I should stop being a p***y and just grab the first gay guy and get f****d.
I wanted my first experience to be nice. It was not. I rushed and all that I felt was getting cut and pain for acouple of days.
This was dramatic to me, becuase I thought after all we go through there should be some compassion between us gays. We beat up each other more and it is a bigger shame, becuase we betray our class. We should protect our class against the discrimintaion, but then we are the biggest biggots.
I served my heart and soul to someone I knew and he crushed my innocense and trust.
I know I will find love eventually, but I will be more careful next time.
Damn the trolls.
December 29, 2011 at 5:51 pm
This is the reason I stay out of the gay scene. There is way too much drama, name calling and putting down each other. It’s a shame. I get more support from the straight community in my life and that’s just not right.
I actually go out of my way to be more friendly to my gay community because I assumed we should stick together and support each other. Everyone complains about not being treated right by the straight community but then they slam other gay men and keep to their “groups”.
I think that sucks!
December 28, 2011 at 3:18 pm
Upps. I think I have misunderstood this post. Sorry.
December 31, 2011 at 1:00 am
If we don’t give up the ego before we won’t be able to let our true self shine.
January 9, 2012 at 10:09 pm
I thought I had posted a reply but I guess it didn’t take. My computer was sick. Anywhy. I know I am a “troll” and I sort of like the word. Maybe it was from the dolls with the long orange hair but I read if you rub a troll’s belly (just his belly mind you) it will bring you good luck. To think of all those gay people shunning trolls. They was losing out on all that good luck. And also losing out at know another human being. (And people acting bad or good is NOT determined by outward appearances!) As Quentin Crisp once said we can’t let the good looking hold the monopoly on love. We ALL deserve it. I’d add “respect” to that. You don’t have to “Feed” me. I’ll just go for a plain, simple, platonic hug. Don’t we all deserve that at least? Something so simple and yet SO powerful.