The other day, while watching TV, I heard a minister refer to being gay as a gift. “It’s a gift from God”, he said. Though the label of God doesn’t resonate with me, his sentiment does. I had never thought about my sexuality as a gift. But I tend to agree.
When I came out to my mother, years and years ago, she asked me (hypothetically) if I’d take a pill to turn straight. I told her that I wouldn’t. She was surprised. She told me that life was already hard enough and wondered why I’d want to continue down a path that would likely be even harder. Gay people, she reminded me, are fighting an uphill civil rights battle and still face discrimination on a large scale.
To be honest, I wasn’t sure why I wouldn’t take the pill. I couldn’t articulate my thoughts. I just knew that I didn’t want to change the fact that I was gay.
The years haven given me the time and experience to collect my thoughts. Today, I realize that being gay has taught me so much. From a very young age, I was forced to ask questions about myself, life and religion. My desires differed from my peers and were against what I was taught. The journey to rectify this disconnect would be one of the most rewarding experiences of my life and a great source of creativity.
The anti-gay discrimination that I faced in university derailed my path toward corporate America. If I had taken the “straight pill”, I’d be sitting in an office tower in NYC counting the minutes until 5pm.
I wouldn’t have this amazing job.
I wouldn’t met most of my friends.
I wouldn’t have used art as an outlet.
I wouldn’t be sharing my life with a beautiful, talented boyfriend.
I wouldn’t be writing this blog.
I wouldn’t be connecting with you.
Being gay is a gift. There’s no ifs, butts or questions about it. If you’re lucky enough to be gay, cherish it always.
June 12, 2009 at 11:03 am
I couldn’t agree more, although I wouldn’t wish it on anyone, I wouldn’t change my being gay either. It has taught me so much about myself, about life…
June 12, 2009 at 6:59 pm
halaluya!! its rainin men!!!
June 13, 2009 at 3:38 pm
You hit the nail on the cuticle with ” – - – although I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.”
I agree with that. There’s another problem with being gay and old,
There’s no one to be friends with and to take care of you.
If you had children that would not be the case, perhaps.
June 13, 2009 at 7:33 pm
SURELY – alone old and gay = it is up to us to act
and change that.
It does not have to be that way.
Are we a community that cares for people in need?
Or are we a group of sad selfish
self centred sickos who are totally
controlled by our c***s?
*
It can be done.
Not on taxpayers money or local admin money
,, not even from charity.
No if we really care we can organise these
thing for ourselves.
OR we could just join the lumpen drug crazed
hedonist set and say f###yu to people less
fortunate than ourselves.
A journey of one thousand miles starts
with one step.
Ask yourself – who can you help.
June 14, 2009 at 6:13 pm
Being gay gives us a special insight to the world. I decided long ago that I am just as worthy as any straight person because God doesn’t make mistakes. I called it a gift and also Mother Nature’s way of controlling the population. Both make sense.
June 12, 2009 at 11:07 am
Yes i agree you learn so many things about everything. Having a different point of view can make a big difference.
June 12, 2009 at 11:18 am
You hit the nail on the dead! I think being gay is the greatest gift of all
June 13, 2009 at 7:38 pm
Does it not depend on one thing Freedom.
Many of your gay brothers and sisters have none.
Aloswill it be the same for you in thirty years
time when you may not be able to get out to clubs etc so easily
and will be less atrractive to others if you do.
When a next generation have adopted music you do not like.
*
If to be gays is to be great and remain great we need to organise and
think.
June 12, 2009 at 11:22 am
I have been asked the same question multiple times too. If I had to go back and do it again, I would still choose to be gay, I am who I am, and I am so happy that i’m this way. You are so right about the fact that we are forced to ask questions about ourselves. Straight people know that they are straight and there is a certain way that they are expected to act, but we must find our own way, and decipher what we think is right for ourselves.
June 12, 2009 at 11:24 am
Your right being gay is a gift… Not only to ourselves but to the people we share our lives with. For some people it takes a little longer to realize how special this is.
June 12, 2009 at 11:47 am
My mom tells me often how blessed she feels to have a gay son, she truly believes its a gift. And I feel the same. It is a gift. Sexuality is a gift – no matter what your preference is. I just hope nobody abuses it!
June 12, 2009 at 11:54 am
Why couldn’t you do those things even if you worked in NYC? I don’t understand. I think New York is full of gay guys who have boyfriends, are artistic, can write, have friends, etc. Remember what you are always preaching – you are in control of things. You should happen to life, not the other way around.
June 12, 2009 at 12:00 pm
While being gay doesn’t define me as a person, it has helped mold me into the person that I am today. I’ve been asked many times before “if you could take a pill…” and like yourself, the answer has always been “No, I wouldn’t”. Reason being mainly because without the internal struggles I’ve experienced, and the struggles of coming out and finding myself, I wouldn’t be the person I am today.
I’m not just another gay guy…
I’m Matthew, the 23 year old Massage Therapist, from Newfoundland, who likes to swim, dance, read cheezy vampire novels, and spend too much time reading/listening to blogs online. I just happen to be gay!
Cheers All!
Matt
June 12, 2009 at 12:15 pm
June 12, 2009 at 12:18 pm
I couldn’t agree more. Being gay has taught so many lessons which I don’t think I would have learnt them being straight. Maybe, if I weren’t gay, I would not be this amazing person I am today. I love being gay.
June 12, 2009 at 12:18 pm
i feel the same way
……….
im still going through it and are just like ur blog here
June 12, 2009 at 12:21 pm
I wouldn’t take a pill either. It would be the same to ask if I could take a pill to make me right handed instead of left…of course not.
Definitely a cool post!
Ciao!
June 12, 2009 at 12:31 pm
i love the idea, and sometimes i even cheer about it, but i think i have a long path to wonder and structure my life, before i can thank enough every day for it…
June 12, 2009 at 12:53 pm
I have often wondered what the “point” of being gay was since it doesnt really serve to advance the human race. Well, turns out it does. I don’t know if this is the “answer” or not, but it is something that makes me feel good, so I believe it. Who knows, maybe the real reason is something that we can’t even begin to explain. But I digress.
In complicated social systems, such as in ant colonies and bee hives, there are a minority of ants/bees that do not mate. ever. They are only there to help the overall advancement of the group. For example, some bees ONLY pollinate and never mate, and some ants ONLY work and help to build. Their only purpose is to advance the overall “race”.
I like to think the same is true about gay people. We may not be here to breed, but instead we can focus our efforts on advancing the arts and other disciplines, which OVERALL, helps us to survive as a race long term.
Makes you think, huh?
June 12, 2009 at 12:55 pm
I have thought of it before i see this post. I always think that being gay is a special gift from god whenever i feel guilty about my sexuality. Also, i think that gay men are the ‘special edition’of men,just like cars have special edition that usually is more attractive.
June 12, 2009 at 1:01 pm
Thanks for the insight. I rarely have stopped
to think of my being Gay as “God’s gift.”
Mostly as a learning experience and/or sometimes
a chore. So today what you wrote helped, Thanks,
D.W.!
June 12, 2009 at 1:28 pm
Davey! I absolutely love you!!! ;__; very much! (:
June 12, 2009 at 1:54 pm
I am not certain if being gay made you who you are, but on the other hand, I figure there is nothing wrong with being gay, so why would I change a fundamental aspect of myself to cater to other people’s prejudices?
And sorry I don’t buy any religious arguments that try to sanctify procreation – fertility cults should have gone out long ago. People must be more than just baby factories to product other baby factories.
What you should ask you mother is if she isn’t better off with a gay son? I think that my recent observations would support, albeit anecdotally, that gay sons treat their parents with more respect and as human beings than straight sons. And are more likely to try to help parents when elderly and not just pack them off to homes.
June 12, 2009 at 3:08 pm
A few months back I was watching Oprah’s best life week. In there, 2 ministers talked about homosexuality in relation to spirituality. One minister clarified his point saying that if God makes everything and you were born gay, then by divine right you are gay. I thought this was an amazing perspective.
I am glad that there are more and more people in this country, much less across the world, that are developing an enlightened view of homosexuals. Barriers are being broken and we are being welcomed into the circle.
June 26, 2009 at 6:11 pm
Is that Oprah – the black lady who has millions while people die of starvation in Africa and the continent has Aids orphans and kids supporting their AIDS victim parents and acting as a parent themselves to their siblings.(and often doing that at the age of 8 or 10). Nice lady NOT. There are more attitudes that need enlightening than just attitudes to Gay people. We Gay people also need to change our attitude to the world we live in
June 12, 2009 at 3:23 pm
… being gay for me only has downsides..
….)
My parrents hate me allready (and i never told them yet) my mother is homofobic :S wich makes everything harder for me (when ill tell them).
so i can’t get a boyfriend because then i qould ruine my life.
but without my life is also CRAP.
i’m stuck in a web of confussion…
i’m lost …
i constantly think about suicide…
i suck at school because i have to much on my mind.
i’m a frickin 15 yearold fat ass (no boy will ever like me
and the thought that i probably have around 60 more sucking years of thins crap makes me sick
June 12, 2009 at 4:07 pm
You can’t be sitting around all life and feeling sorry for your ass, first you have to do something.
Events will come and pass and you will remain yourself, doing what it takes to get by anything that comes around. That’s how life works.
June 12, 2009 at 4:18 pm
life sucks…
June 12, 2009 at 6:40 pm
well, it doesn’t have to suck as hard.
you can do to yourself whatever you desire with only goal to be set by you.
pride, bravery and a lot of sacrifice for a total change. The funny thing is that it takes so much to begin, but later, no matter how big the trouble is you are fine with it because you know why you are in it and would not change a lot.
I know people who were thrown out of houses for being gay, only to say that they don’t regret it.
June 13, 2009 at 5:59 am
i really wish it was that easy !
but it’s not …
June 13, 2009 at 6:05 am
everyone has a style or a way they see the world…
i don’t i have just a world with random stuff i like.
i don’t like a gerne of music…
i don’t like a gerne of art…
i don’t like a gerne of movies..
i only like random music , random art , random movies , random games , just all the random crap that everybody else around me hates… (i only like the sims 3 theme and caramell dansen)
i don’t want to change who i am ! i want everyone one else to change and shape around me..
i tried changing over and over again but i still am my self and everyone has to accept me as i am but they don’t !
and that sucks
June 13, 2009 at 4:40 pm
harmtaro
‘everybody else around me hates… ‘
I don’t know you at all, but I really truly want you to be happy.
If you want others to love you ,you most first learn to love yourself. The same can be said for respect and most others things.
When you feel like you have nothing ,like you are nothing,go back to basics* and you’ll soon realise how silly the things you mentioned above are.
*ie.from what I know of you, you’re breathing.You’ve air in your lungs , a brain in your head. You are (somewhat) literate and have a computer. Only 18percent of people in the world are literate.Just 1 percent have computers. Isn’t that sobering?
Finally ,you’re a teen. Its fine if you dont know who you are yet. This is the time for you to develope who you are as a person. Being gay is one faset of your unfolding character. It’s okay to feel depressed somethings, its a human emotion but if you feel suicidal again, seek help.Suicide is never the answer to a problem Harmtaro. Please ,I implore you to value yourself.
I may sound cheesey with a sige order of corn but the world is a wonderful place to live
xx
June 13, 2009 at 7:23 pm
First know that you are special.
God does not create rubbish, we can make
ourseloves become rubbish but we are made
unique, loved and special.
*
Sadly parents are not always so good.
It is important that people understand
how you are suffering.
Some people cannot understand that
life is tough for other people.
In may countries and cultures to be
known as a person who is gay is to live
in fear of your life.
BUT unkindness, misery, isolation and
rejection by our family can make life
hard as well.
You do not need a lover or sex.
What you ned is a circle of friends
who you can trust.
You need people who value and respect you.
You do NOT need people who will trick you and
just try to get you into bed…..
such people will show you no respect.
You are entitled to respect like anyone else.
*
BUt for now you live in your paents home and
must obey their rules.
The trick is to study hard and work for your i
independence.
Then you can choose your friends.
Then you can make a fun life for yourself.
Then you can choose where you live.
**
Life could be very different in threee years
time when you are 18.
It is not long to wait.
Use the time wisely.
It says in the Bible “If God is for us then
who can be against us” and he is for you.
One place to make contacts – so you do not
have to go to money grabbing clubs and bars -
is The Metropolitan Community Church
- a church for Lesbian Gay etc people.
Like all churches they vary.
Gay people are like everyone else – soem
are saints and some are crooks. So be careful
when you meet people. Take your time before you
trust people. No need to be paranoid – but take your
time and learn about people first.
Life will get better.
But read, THINK and learn.
Then you will be better prepared to deal with the world.
Seeif you can see clips of The Rocky Horror Picture Show
on You Tube – They are good fun
- and you could use some fun.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wAjRs9o72Gw&feature=related
June 15, 2009 at 4:29 am
Of course, everyone has their style, set of things they like, and if they were all the same, they would be just as horrible as planned.
Sexuality is about personal growth. If you don’t realize that then you will find yourself in hollow relationships with other people and yourself.
June 12, 2009 at 3:27 pm
Being gay is NOT a gift, it’s only a fact. Mother Nature chooses the pill you are going to swallow and then you are either gay or straight.
But if you consider it as a gift from God ; it’s a gift that will poison a large part of your life as long as you aren’t able to accept yourself like you are.
bye,
June 12, 2009 at 4:11 pm
I agree, but you’re taking it to a philosophical level, while it’s a lot lower. I’m gay, no matter who chose it, god or a sequence of nitrogen based cyclic molecule. I’m the one who has to get by with it. Some say God made people on his image, so I say that God must be a bit gay himself.
June 13, 2009 at 7:24 am
++ I like the idea of God a bit gay and if you are right, I’m sure there’s much more pleasure in Paradise than if he was only straight++
bye,
June 12, 2009 at 3:59 pm
Very nicely said.
Tomorrow is gay pride parade in my country, eight by the row, and it’s eating my heart away. In my country it is legal to have anti-gay rally on the same day as gay parade. This is the first year when that kind of rally is not allowed, but only because the registered it too late, so I think they will be there anyway. There have been word that there would not be violence on this parade, unlike 2 years ago when there has been planned a Molotov cocktail attack on gay pride parade, but I don’t see how it’s going to be any different than any other years. Out of those 300 people that show up on the parade half gets beat up and half gets verbally attacked by bystanders, and to get general mockery in the peoples eyes.
I am openly gay and I don’t see how it’s going to get any better. The gay community is taking a wrong stand. I am not really proud, so I won’t be joining the parade tomorrow, I will just be passing by it, and it’s eating my heart away.
June 12, 2009 at 6:27 pm
Go anyway. They can take a lot but they can never take who you are.
June 12, 2009 at 6:46 pm
I’ll to be passing by the parade, maybe I’ll just stick around a little longer
You’re a great motivator, or I’m just an easy target. I believe you’re a great motivator
June 13, 2009 at 8:16 am
People in the West are such drips.
They simply do not understand just how dangerous it
is for people in other countries.
They are locked in their own small world complaining
about minor matters like Gay priests.
For you it is very different.
You can be in great physical danger.
Your future employment might be affected.
*
Please be patient with us….
It is like an Arab desert dweller trying to
comprehend snow.
Or an Eskimo understanding a sand dune.
It is only satellite TV and the internet
and modern communications that have
helped widen our understanding.
But many people in the West do not know what it
is to be physically threatened …. and face the
possibility that the police will place the blame on
you rather than your attackers.
June 14, 2009 at 3:53 am
I for one know a bit about the danger of being gay in some parts of the world. Boys and men are literally executed for the “crime” of being gay in some Muslim countries now. However, this was true not so long ago in the Western world also. The world can change, even if it is always more slowly than we would like.
Meanwhile, even in the dangerous countries, some people manage to create safe places for themselves. I wish it wasn’t necessary, but survival is important. This is true on the personal level as well as in cultures — make a safe place for yourself, *within* yourself first, and then the world WILL shape itself around you as you desire. Love yourself, then/so that you can love your neighbor, your brother, your sister. Love isn’t the fast way to change the world, but in the end — it’s the only way.
June 15, 2009 at 4:35 am
Sounds extremely familiar
Police rather choose not to react to that little number of reported attacks. In Saturday the anti-gay rally went on no matter, but police didn’t put a stop to it but only took in station three persons only when they verbally and tried physically to attack the parade visitors.
But I guess that’s why we have a parade. Why we have to have a parade.
June 15, 2009 at 12:34 pm
,,, the behaviour of some people who delight in
outrage does not help things.
The problem is that the people who get atacked are usually
not the same people who like to make
themselves feel important Iand be the centre of attention) by causing outrage.
People out shopping with their families do not want to see highly sexual
behaviour in public.
That applies whether with their children or their parents.
It applies to both straight and gay (LBGT) people.
Some people need to grow up and learn we are there
presenting ourselves to the public.
I don’t want to be presented as an idiot.
Dresses and costumes and colour are fine.
Great fun.
But lets not show ourselves as 30 year olds behaving as ten year olds.
June 15, 2009 at 12:55 pm
Of course. Can you even imagine a gay pride parade in a country like mine. Tourists recognize what parade is only by the flag.
The most retarded thing I mostly hear from my friends is that they do not like the idea of the parade because of the nakedness and promiscuity, that that is not the way to parade. It’s because of ONE year, ONE parade and ONE man dressed only in red underpants with a flag in his hand and a word on his chest in red PEDERČINA (faggot). That guy went in all papers.
People who I know have never went on a parade and still they have a picture of a gay guy just like that naked one. A kiss appears only in front of cameras. Journalism always concentrates on noticeable things, so I see reality as opposite to the world journalism creates.
June 15, 2009 at 2:49 pm
I remember back in the 70′s a highly political time.
Strikers were to appear on TV ..
Before they appeared they were offered seats in a room
There were lots of free drinks.
(It may have been a truck or it may have been well intended by the technicians who perhaps sympathised with their struggle – who knows)
BUT WHAT DO YOU THINK HAPPENED.
Yes it was obvious to viewers they had been drinking.
What impresion was gained of them at a critical stage in their struggle?
**
Sp I think that while we should not aim to be
“So Respectable” we need to grow up.
Why do some lBGT people have to behave in a childish manner.
It is not so bad when it is 17/18 year olds.
But come on older guys – grow up.
June 15, 2009 at 1:01 pm
And I almost forgot. Attacks have to be reported to the police, no matter what. With three to four reported attacks a year you can’t even make statistic, and who would ever believe that crimes then even happen.
June 15, 2009 at 2:55 pm
/// and if for example you were in a relationship or you were a married straight guy. out fopr a bit of nefarious fun? If you had children or lived in a small village where every movement is known and remebered for decades. Not so easy eh! What if you were on drugs at the time? Wg=hat if a relative is working for the police or your dad is a vicar.
It is easy to judge people. Life is not the same everywhere. But you are right.
June 17, 2009 at 2:17 pm
Well, decide. You or the vicar, you or your dad. It takes a bit of egoism, but in the end only your desires are those whose fulfilling you can sense. Only you have your answers. I’m not gonna judge. And if the question is problem with sexuality, there is only one answer. With all due respect to the vicar, the father, the Monty python an the holy grail knight…
June 12, 2009 at 4:15 pm
i love u!! u r awesome
June 12, 2009 at 6:11 pm
A pill to make you like p***y— no thanks!
June 12, 2009 at 6:27 pm
that’s fine but when you post a pic of you in undies with a rainbow coming out of your head like the leprechaun on the lucky charms box you only reinforce the surface
gay doesn’t always have to look like that you tool–in fact in most cases is does not.
June 12, 2009 at 7:32 pm
that’s a cool picture!…you know you’re jealous…lol
June 12, 2009 at 7:04 pm
“Being gay is a gift. There’s no ifs, butts or questions about it. If you’re lucky enough to be gay, cherish it always.”
For me, I’m happy about my sexuality, yeah. But if you’re Matthew Shepard, tortured to death because of how you were born, then no, you’re not lucky.
Yeah, it’s done well for you, but not for everyone, Dave.
June 12, 2009 at 7:41 pm
my best friend was telling me that. I didn’t realize it. She pointed out that if I was straight I wouldn’t be totally different. I wouldn’t have such a close relationship with God,and so many other reasons. You’re right,being gay is a gift. Plus we get to control population growth!yay!
June 13, 2009 at 9:59 am
So, being gay led you to God? If you weren’t gay, would you be an atheist? And if so, how do you know that that viewpoint isn’t a more accurate one? You should be proud to be gay of course. I’m just questioning the reasons behind it.
And while population growth is an issue in regards to the well-being of this planet, it’s really not a big deal otherwise. Besides, even if you’re straight, you don’t have to have kids if you don’t want to. There’s plenty of methods of birth control these days.
June 13, 2009 at 12:02 pm
Yes it did. I at first thought that God hated me. But I’ll never forget the day when I was praying. I was praying that God cleansed me and forgave my sin. But during my prayer,This voice..this voice was so beautiful. It was the voice of a woman. She said to me that God did not hate me at all. And that I was perfect the way I was. And she told me to believe in the love of God,and that’s all I would ever need. The feeling was something else too. the only word that I could use to describe it was straight up,unconditional love. The love wrapped me in a tight blanket. I cried.lol That experience increased my faith in God,and that God really wants the best for us,and nothing short of it. And I’ve changed so much as a christian. before I was VERY rigid. I was a bible thumper. Now I’m more relaxed,liberal Christianity. i used to say that people of other religions and faiths would go to hell. I don’t think like that anymore.lol listen to me..preachin and such.lol
June 13, 2009 at 2:40 pm
OK. That was unrelated to my point, but you’re entitled to whatever imaginary friends you choose.
June 13, 2009 at 7:46 pm
The important difference is that you believe in God as revealed in the way it is revealed in how Jesus lived His life. Before you believed in “The Bible”.
Get that book in balance.
Much of it is quite bad.
Read it and compare the mistaken ideas that men had
with the wonderful reality of Gods love as revealed
in Jesus.
After Jesus The Apostles and Saint Paul did their best.
But they were human.
It is what Jesus taught us in His sort life as told
in The Gospels that really counts.
It really is very modern.
Real emotional intelligence.
And it certainly didn’t preoccupy itself with hating
Gay people.
June 12, 2009 at 10:42 pm
My youngest child is gay, and we only had him from age 14 on, but I completely see his gayness as a blessing on all of us. It is one important part of him, and I love every bit! I don’t wish to be gay, or that my straight kids were gay, and I wouldn’t want Colin to be straight either. We love them all just the way they are. Rather than anyone or anything changing him, I’m trying to change our society to be more inclusive and equal. That’s good for all of us, gay and straight alike. Harmtaro and Erehton — have hope. Things are improving, and they will continue to get better. I love you, and hope you love yourselves too.
June 13, 2009 at 6:31 am
I would never change being gay for anything. Regardless of the uphill and downhill battles I’ve been through. I love every moment of my life and i also have an amazing, talented boyfriend i’m ready to dedicate my life to. And i know if i wasn’t gay my life would be very different now.
I cherish the luck I’ve been bestowed.
June 13, 2009 at 7:04 am
i am gay you are gay we all of us are gay thank you GOD we all gay the best people are gay
June 13, 2009 at 8:05 am
Is that all you have to thank God for Davey?
*
“The Best people Are Gay” says Chris Scott….
Well also sadly So Are The Worst.
We reflect humanity.
*
For myself I am Proud To Be Gay -
but trying to change myself for the better and behave as a Christian should comes first.
That means trying for real change within not just acting politically correct.
Such change is not always easy and takes time.
June 13, 2009 at 8:56 am
We are who we are and few would ever want to change.
June 13, 2009 at 9:26 am
my Uncle told me-in the last year before he died-you are -what you are-how so very true.the uniqueness -creativity-the friends ive made-id never trade-for anything.i would never contemplate-a str8 pill-if there was one.we are all unique-we are one unique genre-different from others-in a good way.Yes-Yes-Yes-We Truly-are a Gift from God.
June 13, 2009 at 10:57 am
Our greatest gift is that we can Love one another. We don’t need to fight to prove we are “real” men.
Be well,
June 13, 2009 at 11:05 am
NICE……………………..
June 13, 2009 at 11:34 am
I’ve never liked the question, `would you take a pill…` I just can’t wrap my mind around it being that easy to change who I am!
June 13, 2009 at 1:22 pm
what about us straight chicks?
not only being gay but just being yourself is the key here, and accepting every aspect of it as a gift. (:
June 14, 2009 at 4:34 am
Amazing , intelligent view point ! Everyone on the planet should read this !
June 14, 2009 at 6:02 pm
Read it with what purpose = derision?
How would they see it?
Not everyone reads thru loving eyes.
Some would read to add to their list
of people to go to the next Auschwitz.
Some would see an infidel suicide bomb target,
or someone thye might wish to throw of a
cliff top.
Some mistaken people claiming to be
Christian would see work for the exorcist.
Are you sure that you want everyone to read it.
There are plenty of KKK and Muslim Taliban type
extremists on You Tube who would have great amusement
It could be arranged.
June 15, 2009 at 8:08 am
Davey abs look a little flabby.
great post
June 15, 2009 at 12:22 pm
Have you only just noticed?
June 16, 2009 at 3:05 am
I know being gay is a gift, there is most passion in bed, lol more fire!
June 16, 2009 at 1:51 pm
How do you know Enrique?
.. or are you just talking about yourself.
June 16, 2009 at 6:39 am
I think that the “would u take the pill” question depends on what kind of life you have.
As a gay boy, being homosexual means, for some of us, being part of the gay world, the clubs, your gay friends, the gay music, the gay fashion, etc. If it’s the case, and I think it is for me, then yes, the pill would change definitly my life. But I’ve got some gay friends completly out of the gay scene and for them, I’m not sure it would be such a big difference to be straight. Then you’ve got other people, as said in other posts here, who live in countries where being gay is just dangerous and I’m sure a lot of them would like to be straight, not because they don’t like themselves, but because their life would just be safer.
In my case, the real question beyond the “pill” one would be “do you like yourself?”, and I would have taken the pill when I was younger, because I was very shy and when I realized I was gay, I felt even more a part of the others. Then I discovered the gay world (cause hopefully there is one where I live) and all its “wonders” : parties, boys, elegance, sex and fun. It helped me to feel better and I wouldn’t have changed that for nothing, and would have refused the pill.
But the true is that my happiness doesn’t depend on my homosexuality, but much more on my self-estime.
For some people, being gay can means living in a glamourous world, partying with the most gorgeous boys and having eccentric and funny friends. Instead of “apart” you can feel “special”; but I actually think it’s just another reflect of the gay perception. In one side people consider gays as perverted, depraved or monstrous, and on the other side people think gays are the most sophisticated and cultured persons, with amazing free sex. I think there are both cliches, cause of course you can be all of this, gay or straight.
So for me now, being gay just means that I’m attracted by men. I can chose to go out to the gay clubs every night, or going to a concert with my straight friends, maybe having a kid later with my partner, or decide to stay alone a enjoy the boys for a while… It’s all about my choices, and I would have to face them too if I were straight.
So to conclude this long post, I don’t think that being gay is a gift that could give you special innate skills. Being able to chose what you want to do with your life, that’s the real gift.
June 16, 2009 at 5:17 pm
its funny how you can take an ideas i seem only to half understand and put it clearly into words!
you look as great as ever on that picture
a thankful redhead
June 16, 2009 at 5:24 pm
being gay is a gift.gay people have talents most straight people don’t.they break up the genericness (probably not a word before but it is now.)of life.you know all the vibrant colors in the world, that is all becuase of gay people.anyone here who isn’t gay knows who to thank for a non monochromatic world.
June 16, 2009 at 6:18 pm
John D — yeah, I don’t see it just as a gift to individual blessed gay men and women, but to our larger culture. Diversity is always a strength and a blessing. Would we want to live in a world of black, white and gray, or as you say, with the vibrancy of the rainbow all around us? I love taking photos in BW, but I want to live in the world of color.
June 18, 2009 at 4:56 pm
so do you do photography? because i’ve taken an interest in the subject.i live in europe and the inspiring views seem to be everywhere.
June 18, 2009 at 7:20 pm
He means the vibrancy that comes from Gay people being different.
It breaks the mono tone of people who live in Little boxes made of tick tacky – little boxes all the same.
It is great that you have a hobby though and that you are alert to the beauty of the landscape and natural world.
At least you are not one of the dreary gay people who is obsessed with c**k and drugs.
June 19, 2009 at 6:53 am
thanks, i think things should be enjoyed in small amounts.i also enjoy working with pastels.what do you do in your time?
June 19, 2009 at 1:33 pm
Bit lost these days John. Waiting for my bf to come over from the Philippines. So no sex and little zest for life. It’s a bit of a leap of faith. I am waiting on builders to cpmplete work. I have lived with modifications for years. Just want a settled home now and to enjoy relaxed time with my friends. Gardening still brings a smile. Its horrible getting older I have finally learned to enjoy life and now the slow effects of old age are creeping in. Its like being on a two week holiday and you know its the second week, I am a person who once he knows there is to be a change wants to get on with it, So I hope for a long life but – well I need something new to bring a shine to life. I hope that sharing life with my bf will do that. I am a max man not a minimalist. Do you love life?
June 19, 2009 at 9:16 pm
Absolutely, being gay is a gift .. truly one of my Life’s greatest Blessings! Through the challenges that my homosexuality have offered, I’ve learned so much in these past 46 years .. about prejudice & compassion, about fear & courage, about heartbreak & friendship, but most of all about love & acceptance, especially of “them” .. those “others” who “don’t get it” .. it’s helped me “get it” .. Love, that is! I would not take the pill. I wouldn’t have missed this for the world.
Love you, Davey!
June 26, 2009 at 5:55 pm
I see your watching Oprah!
I saw that episode as well!
July 6, 2009 at 12:32 am
I just want to tell you how much you inspire me. I’m fifteen years old and I always thought to myself that being gay was a disadvantage. All my friends know I’m gay but family doesn’t. I’m really afraid to tell them. Any advice? Thank you so much for reading this.
July 6, 2009 at 12:29 pm
You are in your parents house and have to abide by their rules.
There are good people who are gay, there are moaners (like me!) and there are strange people and there are conceited or even crooked people.
Make sure that you are able to judge people carefully.
Your parents will be worried for your safety and future happiness. They do not want you to grow old and lonely. They want to see you with someone you can trust…. and lead a happy settled life.
They do not want to see you become a nasty conceited gut who everyone loves because they are young —— and then become a lonely sad old man.
I should wait until you are a little bit financially and emmotionally independant if I were you before you tell your parents.
They will be less protective as you get older.
They will have to accept you are an independent grown man then.
BUT you will have to make your own mistakes,
Try to think carefully what you want from life.
Young gay life seems wild and exciting…
But as you get older it is sad when you realise that life’s journey is ending.
You will have no children to enjoy watching grow up.
You may be the lone elderly uncle….
try to remain a part of family life if you can, however independent you become.
Be happy. x
July 31, 2009 at 9:25 am
I agree. If my mom asked me to take that pill, i would say no. I dont want to change myself at all
August 10, 2009 at 12:23 pm
I personally believe that who you are is so unique that to want to change something that is at the core of who you are is ridiculous. Everything we encounter allows us to grow. Never wish to change who you are! You are amazing!
August 11, 2009 at 12:57 pm
hey, first of all congrats for ur blog, i really like it so much, im from mexico. well, i do share what u think, im not out now, but i know im gay, no one else know, just a few friends, but being gay is nice, im 20 and i think a lot of great things r waiting me, n i wouldnt change my life… is just way to cool.