It seems like one of the universal laws of nature is that whatever you give is what you get. Violence begets violence. Love begets love. And of course, drama begets drama. Enjoy this impromptu – and late night – talky blog via Davey Wavey Raw:
It seems like one of the universal laws of nature is that whatever you give is what you get. Violence begets violence. Love begets love. And of course, drama begets drama. Enjoy this impromptu – and late night – talky blog via Davey Wavey Raw:
August 24, 2010 at 9:03 am
true some people just need to have drama it’s what their life revolves around
and yes one of my friend’s life is pure drama she says she hates it yet she won’t ignore it
August 24, 2010 at 10:19 am
I would agree in most cases but there are times when you can inadvertently get sucked into drama. Even then you can usually disarm it by not participating or withdrawing from the situation. Just don’t fuel the fire.
August 24, 2010 at 10:34 am
dear davey wavey – i agree wholeheartedly with your hypothesis, and as is often the case with your blog posts, this one dovetails remarkably with recent events in my life. my response to a difficult childhood has been to construct for myself, in adulthood, a sheltered, largely hermit-like existence, yet i’ve spent a large portion of this calendar year asking myself and my friends, “why is there so much drama in my life, when i work so hard to keep it away from me?” it finally dawned on me, a few weeks ago, that i have to own the fact that i draw the drama to me, whether it’s my conscious intention or not. as you say, i have to learn to let other people’s provocations pass over me if i truly want to avoid the conflicts and clashes; by engaging people in their craziness, i am participating in it, and the fact that 2010 has been such a shitstorm of such drama for me is evidence that, on some level (subconscious, perhaps), i want the drama. to truly move past it, i have to learn to let the provocations of others wash over me; to own my responsibility in creating and perpetuating such situations; and be stronger in my sense of self, such that i no longer feel the slightest desire to take such bait. it’s one of those life lessons i’ve learned intellectually, but still need to fully absorb on emotional and practical levels. your thoughts are timely for me, much appreciated, and, as always, wise. how can you be half my age, yet twice as smart and wise? you are truly an old soul. thank you once again for all that you do. love, jonathan L
August 24, 2010 at 10:35 am
Okay I lied before this will be my last post but I did happen to come across this and watched it and have to say a few words. Not to worry I will be back in Italy on Thursday and the internet sucks balls over there. Anways here it is:
Gays and drama? Isn’t that a oxymoron? (sarcasim) Thats like saying women arent drama queens…not much difference on the emotion level between many women and some gays. If fact many gays easily identify themselves as “femme” or “female” but only one problem with this…the balls between their legs.
August 24, 2010 at 11:24 am
You go to bed at 9pm regularly?
August 24, 2010 at 11:40 am
Read the book a New Earth by ekhart tolle, It tells you a better detail on why there is drama and why we continue to create it and spread it or why others do it, You have only uncovered a part of it but there is alot more to it than just drama.
August 24, 2010 at 11:42 am
I agree 100%.
I have a friend who is a perfect example of your philosophy here, Davey. For example, she always seems to get into some kind of trouble with every teacher or authority figure she encounters. She claims that all teachers have it out for her. It always makes me wonder, though, if she ever puts the pieces together to realized that the one thing all of her “getting into trouble” moments have in common is her.
August 24, 2010 at 12:43 pm
you clearly have not met my white male supremacist dad who beat me and my mother.
August 24, 2010 at 12:57 pm
you look really tired. it’s funny. thank you for making me laugh, despite the seriousness of the topic.
<3
August 24, 2010 at 2:48 pm
Digging the background music
I like the idea of a karmic balance of drama and other forces.
Shakespear anyone: My bounty as boundless as the sea my love as deep. The more I give the to thee the more I have for both are infinite. <3
August 24, 2010 at 2:57 pm
I feel the same way, although i see it a bit differently. Yes drama begets drama but drama also tends to follow certain people. People who enjoy being in drama have drama as a bedfellow and tend to have it follow them wherever they go.
P.S. I think you would look adorable Davey with blonde hair. Just saying.
August 24, 2010 at 7:06 pm
I have a couple of friends who you have described here they’re always in trouble but they haven’t figured out wat causes the trouble is them
August 25, 2010 at 1:30 am
Oh no you didnt just go there.. Lol… You surprise me everytime with your blog, Davey..
It’s always “S/he said, s/he said” everything gets misunderstood.. Just one little exaggeration will lead to big problems..
I have many dramas in my life.. I choose to ignore most of them.. The ones that i don’t ignore is if my feelings are getting hurt bad… There are some drama that just hits you
Because people are jealous.. When people are jealous i always quote from the movie MEAN GIRLS: “i can’t help it that im popular.”
Yes Davey, you are right about those boring people who have nothing to do but stir up something for their pleasure…
Drama is always going to be around.. It’s that little devil in you. If you want drama free, you can’t, it’s impossible… Life wouldn’t be normal without it..
August 25, 2010 at 7:40 am
I support the comment about Ekhart Tolle’s book A New Earth. I think I’ve read (or listened to the CD) about 10 times. I’m a slow learner. Also, check him out on YouTub. It will bring you deeper into this subject as well as others. He previously wrote the book The Power of NOW.
August 25, 2010 at 8:55 am
I think this blog about drama is a little too simplistic or polarized; black vs. white; good vs. bad, etc.
Drama might have something to do with one’s mental wiring or cultural influences. I’ve heard it said that some nationalities (of which I’m one of) make love with their fists. Remember Broke Back Mountain? I think the most intimate scenes were when the two guys were fighting; it beats blowing bubbles at each other on the mountainside.
It’s like talking about stress as “bad”. “I don’t want any stress in my life”. If I didn’t have any stress I would still be in bed but maybe some extreme stressful experiences I might want to avoid, i.e. being eaten by a bear while living in a treehouse naked in New Hampshire.
If one is going to play cute and regurgitate life wisdom in one’s mid 20s maybe more research needs to be done.
August 25, 2010 at 10:15 am
out of line
August 25, 2010 at 12:37 pm
You just hit on a huge “hot point” in my life. My sister-in-law, has to be the biggest drama queen I have EVER met. She consistently, says “why does drama follow me?” I’ve know this woman for many years, we went to high school together and drama has followed her all her life, but can’t understand why.
She has absolutely no filter on her brain or her mouth. She expresses every thought she has, every minute she has it. She offends someone almost every time she opens her mouth. She smiles to your face and talks behind your back. She loves attention, good or bad, it’s attention and thrives on it. She recently stirred up drama within my family, that caused my brother and I not to speak for 3 months and I come from a very close family. I admit I fell into her crap, but it came to the point where I couldn’t stand by and let her destroy another opportunity.
She talks behind my parents backs (these are people who have helped them out tremendously over the years). I let the comments “slide” because I won’t buy into her drama. She is a controlling, manipulating person who is not happy unless she is the center of attention.
August 25, 2010 at 1:17 pm
John,
It might be of value for you to read the book, “Emotional Vampires; Dealing with People Who Drain You Dry” but Albert J. Bernstein, Ph.D.
Google the author’s name brings you to a good site.
This easy read fun book illustrated to me different personality types that are what he calls emotional vampires. But, it also instructs the reader how to deal with them. It also illustrates how to spot them a mile away (so you don’t end up with any kind of relationship).
Dealing with emotional vampires is a skill that many of us don’t have; at least I didn’t.
I have a friend who has been a therapist for over 20 years that refuses to deal with those with borderline personality disorder. He would rather eat dirt first.
Much like having a nutritional diet healthy living has a lot to do with what people you are willing to take into your life. I make the mistake all the time but I wake up faster than I did at first.
Drama queens want an audiance and a reaction; don’t give that pleasure.
I wish you well.
August 25, 2010 at 2:41 pm
Davey, Some folks call this (as you do here), “drama”, others call this “melodrama” (maybe a bit more pertinent), but I, following the example of that wise old (alas, deceased) librarian, Harold Ferner (U. Mass. Boston, Science Library) call this sort of thing “soap opera”! That’s about to what this kind of silly dramatisation of personal life amounts, and, as “drama begets drama”, one running episode of personal “soap opera” leads to another the very next day.
Ugh! Who needs soap opera in his own life? Only a fool does!
Pax, Jerry Parker
August 25, 2010 at 2:45 pm
Oh drama scenes are sooo exhausting- before-during-and after their existence. It is only entertaining when it is in two dimensions and that you read or heard from second source about it. But to live it is a pure nightmare sucking up all your energy, mixing up your emotions and kicking up your high blood pressure to boot! And if you give it up to its powerful apparently seductive vortex (under flimsy reasons like revenge, hurt pride, will to help another one) -you regret it for ages.
For all of us poor gays witnessing too many dramas- Humour is a potent drug, I highly recommend, sudden flatulence, or looking at Russian Wedding on YOUTUBE! Love to all, precious treasures of New England, Georgia Illinois and Wisconsin.
August 25, 2010 at 4:37 pm
Thanks Dave, I’ll look into it. The drama was comical, many years ago, but now that I’m older, and hopefully wiser….it’s become old and annoying.
August 25, 2010 at 5:11 pm
John,
“Discontent is the first step towards progress”; not my quote but someone elses.
When I look back the most progressive stuff that I have done started with discontent. I know you have family involved (people you genuinely love) but maybe you can lead by example without alienating.
The humour used in the book Emotional Vampires I think helps the reader digest the content(which is heavy and triggering). It also appeals to the real person and not the intellectual psycho-babbler therapist.
If you need any support you can reach me at minivandriver@charter.net. In my work I deal with a lot of trauma victims. I have many more quotes and have deal with many emotional vampires. ouch!!!
Again, my best,
Dave
August 25, 2010 at 9:55 pm
karma, what goes around comes around!
The person you are pulls the moments and people you are by yourself.
it’s sounds hard, but the moments that cross your life is a learning moment. not a moment to sit down and relax.
who you are in person reflex in the moment, energy and persons.
it’s only growth!
August 26, 2010 at 1:13 pm
Two quick things:
1) One of the best ways to start drama is to say, ” I hate drama” or “I don’t know why there’s so much drama in my life.” or any variation thereof, b/c one of two things will happen. People will ask you about it and then you can talk about all your drama or people disagree or confront you about it, giving you the grounds to create more drama. I know b/c I have an innate gift for drama and have many dramatic friends. In spite of that, I do not lead an overly dramatic life b/c I have learned that the best way to limit the drama is to simply not engage. Do not engage under any circumstances. No good can come of it. Only drama.
2) So the first thing was quick but this is. Does anyone else see the Alfred Hitchcock looking profile over Davey’s left shoulder? It’s all frowny and dramatic looking… weird.
August 26, 2010 at 6:58 pm
Totally agree! Eckhart is amazing. Finally someone who cuts through the religiosity of the “spiritual” crowd.
Be well,
August 28, 2010 at 12:55 am
your hair looks really good in this talky blog. just thought you should know. :]